Destined to be together?
by HR always live on
Summary: Set just after 8-1. Malcolm leaves the service and runs into a very familiar stranger abroad. Ruth has appeared once more, can she and Harry be reunited? Epilogue now up.
1. Chapter 1

**Okay, here's a new story. Working on the rest for this. Story starts in 8-1 but assumes Ruth was never brought back to the UK or disturbed from her life in that episode.**

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><p>Malcolm knocked on Harry's door and then opened it to find his boss and friend pouring a very large whisky. "Tough day?" Malcolm asked.<p>

"Oh you know," Harry said taking a sip. "The usual. Kidnap and torture for terrorists looking for hidden uranium. All in a days work."

"They didn't hurt you?" Malcolm asked.

"I'll be fine," Harry said, sitting down heavily. "Want a whisky?"

"No thank you," Malcolm said. "I wanted to talk to you. I want to retire Harry."

"What?" he replied. Out of all the things he'd been expecting, that wasn't it. "But… why? What will you do?"

"I've had enough Harry," Malcolm said. "I need to leave while I'm still sane. Maybe I'll read books by the beach. I've always wanted to visit the south of France, now I'll be able to. Plus there's about a hundred up and coming techie's who will be much cheaper than me. I'm getting old."

"You've been doing this as long as I have."

"Which is why I want to leave," Malcolm said. "Don't argue with me or I'll change my mind and end up dying here in Thames House."

"I'm not going to argue." Harry said with half a smile. "Go home and take a long break."

"You could always leave too," Malcolm said, knowing as he said it that it wouldn't happen.

"I won't," he said quietly.

"Can you sort out my decommissioning?" Malcolm asked.

"Consider it done," Harry said, smiling. "Do keep in touch. I know ex service people aren't meant to but…"

"Of course I will Harry," Malcolm said. "Goodbye Harry." Harry smiled as Malcolm left the dim confines of the grid. He filled his glass again and took a deep steadying sip. The real reason he wouldn't retire is because he didn't trust himself. If he had nothing to do, no work to go to, there wouldn't be anything to stop him looking into a certain beautiful brunette who'd been forced to flee the country several years before. He never stopped thinking about her but locked in the grid everyday he was reminded that if he ever looked for her he could bring serious danger to her. And he would never do that. As much as the distance between them hurt him desperately, he knew it was for her own safety. Jeopardising that was not an option. He feared that if he was left alone at home, with nothing to do, he'd forget that and find her. Simply jumping on a plane to wherever she was.

Turning his thoughts away from the temptation he opened his desk drawer, and lifted up the false bottom. As well as a hidden alternate identity for him there was a single picture he cherished more than any other. The only one he had of her. She hadn't been looking at the camera, but over the photographers shoulder, so the blue of her eyes was still striking. A small smile was playing over her lips which pained him. He wanted her to be happy, but mostly he wanted her to be happy with him. In another life, at another time they should have been together. But that happiness wasn't meant for them. He took one last look of her photograph, half remembering, half imagining the scent of her hair. Then he put the picture back where it had come from. He started filling out the paperwork for Malcolm's retirement to keep himself busy. It wasn't like anyone was waiting at home for him after all.

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><p><strong>Three Months Later<strong>

Malcolm was sitting in a beautiful little French café, reading a novel, as he had said he would. In fact he was having a brilliant time. The temperature in Saint-Cyprien was hotter than England would ever get, the beach was only a five minute walk away, but the south of France was still close enough to home if there was a problem with his mother who had had no desire to travel abroad at all.

Malcolm slipped his bookmark in at the end of his chapter and stirred his rapidly cooling coffee. He looked out of the window watching the world go by and debated whether he should order another croissant or not. He'd been here a week already and he hadn't found anything to beat this little cafés baked goods yet. While looking out of the window he saw something that made him stare through the window. Someone he never expected to see again was walking past the window. Ruth Evershed, her dark hair catching the light as she walked down the street. Holding her hand was a little girl wearing a blue summer dress, who judging from the exact match in hair colour must have been Ruth's daughter. She couldn't have been anyone else.

He snapped out of his stupor and threw a pile of Euros on the table before leaving the café. It was way too much money but at the moment he didn't care. He had to catch up with Ruth. He ran after her and then thought he was really too old to be running down the street after women. He'd never even done it when he was younger after all. "Ruth!" he called. She froze for a second and then without turning around she picked up the little girl in her arms and started to run. It was an even match between them as she was carrying the child, even though he was exhausted. Completely out of breath he kept running, ignoring the ache in his lungs.

"Ruth would you just look at me!" he called in a last desperate attempt to make her turn. Miraculously she did. She froze when she recognised him. The little girl had wide hazel eyes, looking scared of her mothers sudden run through the streets.

"Oh my God," she breathed, her blue eyes wide as he approached her. "Malcolm. But how? I was sure no one could find me!"

"I wasn't looking for you," Malcolm said honestly.

"We can't talk about this here," Ruth said, looking around as if she was being hunted. "Rue de Allende. By the beach, I'm the one with a green front door. Come when she's asleep." Before Malcolm could even reply she had vanished down a side street, leaving nothing but a haze of heat in her wake. He watched the space where she'd been in a daze. Had that really just happened? Had he really bumped into Ruth in a small town in south east France? He had no idea why she was here, as well as the chances of bumping into her being absolutely miniscule. And he had no idea about the little girl either. But one thing was for sure. He was going to find her later that night.

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><p><strong>What do you think?<strong>


	2. Chapter 2

**Thanks for all the reviews. I'm so glad the first part was well received. Here's the next bit...**

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><p>Dusk was falling and the temperature was plummeting by the time Malcolm worked his way across the seafront. Ruth's house wasn't too difficult to find. He knocked on the wooden green door and was quickly faced with Ruth, who had a weary smile on her face. "Come in," she said, moving aside. Malcolm followed her into the kitchen where they both sat down.<p>

"I wasn't looking for you," Malcolm said. "It's a coincidence."

"Normally I don't believe in coincidence," Ruth said with a smile. "Why are you in the south of France?"

"I've retired," he said. "I'm on a rather long holiday."

"We both made it out of Thames House alive then?" Ruth said. She took a sip of her wine, which she had clearly been drinking before he arrived. She looked at the bottle pointedly and Malcolm nodded so she poured him a glass.

"How are you?" he asked.

"Okay, all things considered," she said. "You did give me a fright this morning. Calling my real name when no one's done that in years. I'm going under Rachel Evans just for future reference."

Malcolm nodded and then thought of the child in Ruth's arms earlier that day. "Was that girl this morning…?"

"Yes," Ruth said with a smile. "She's my daughter." Her whole face brightened when she thought of her little girl. "Her name's Lily. She's beautiful and I love her to pieces."

"How old is she?" Malcolm asked. She locked eyes with him for a second and knew that wasn't the question he was actually asking.

"She'll be three next month," Ruth said. "I know what you're thinking so just ask me."

"Is she Harry's?" Malcolm said bluntly after only a seconds pause.

Ruth smiled into her wine glass, thinking of the life she'd lost back in England. "Yes. She is. I mean, you only have to look into her eyes and you know she's his."

"Does he know?" Malcolm asked.

"No," Ruth said shaking her head sadly. "I only found out I was pregnant when I stayed in Paris for a few days after Cotterdam. I was on the run, I couldn't risk contacting him. It would have put me in danger, after all I'm supposed to be dead."

"He'd want to know."

"And I want to tell him," Ruth said. "I can't tell you how many times I've looked at the phone, knowing he's only a call away. But I can't risk it. It isn't just me anymore. If any harm came to Lily because of my carelessness I'd never forgive myself." Malcolm nodded, understanding the difficulty of the situation.

"I'm so sorry," Malcolm said. Ruth looked at him curiously. "For making you uncomfortable when I mentioned your dinner with Harry. It might have all turned out differently."

"Thank you Malcolm, but I don't think it would have made a difference. I'd still have been forced to leave and it was hard enough as it was. It never was your fault, I just wasn't brave enough."

"You were on the run, using a fake identity," he said slowly. "You had no one to turn to, and you were pregnant. You managed to form a whole new life for yourself here. That is brave Ruth." She smiled in gratitude and then turned when she heard a shuffling by the door.

"Mummy?"

"Hey," Ruth said with a smile. "Bad dream?" Lily nodded but looked at Malcolm warily. "Don't worry sweetheart, this is an old friend of mine," Ruth said getting up from her chair and bending down so she was on her daughters level. Lily looked at Malcolm for another second before curling up in her mothers arms. Ruth lifted the girl and sat back in her chair, stroking her hair softly as Lily's eyes fluttered closed.

"She'll be asleep again in a minute," Ruth said quietly as she gently rocked her daughter. Malcolm watched them together intently. He had never imagined Ruth as a mother, but he had to admit that motherhood suited her wonderfully. He waited until Lily had drifted off before speaking.

"What are you going to do in a couple of years when she starts asking questions about her father?"

"I don't know," Ruth said. "I would love nothing more than for Harry to be here with her. Honestly, and whenever I think about how he'd react if he knew I was keeping something this important from him… It makes me feel awful."

"I'll try and think of something," Malcolm said. Ruth shook her head but he continued. "I'd never put you or Lily in danger, but I have to at least give it a try."

"Okay," Ruth replied. "But I'm not hopeful." Malcolm nodded and thought it was time to leave them alone.

"I'll come and see you again, if its okay?" Malcolm asked.

"Yes," Ruth said with a smile. "Its good to see you." Malcolm left as Ruth put Lily back to bed.

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><p>Later that night, Ruth had one of the most vivid dreams she had had in years. She was brought back to the time when she had invited Harry into her home for coffee after their one and only date. They both knew that so much more than coffee was implied in that statement. It had been frantic and desperate and incredibly intense. His touch had burned all over her skin and the urgency had been so clear and potent that neither of them had even thought about protection. During that night he had made her feel like the most beautiful and desirable woman in the world. She couldn't wait to experience it all over again, but fate had different plans. It was destined to never be repeated and then life got in the way, throwing her to a different country, miles away from Harry.<p>

She awoke suddenly, shaking with the intensity of her dream. Running a hand over her face she wondered if she'd ever be able to forget that night. It had been fantastic but relieving something she could never have back was rather like taunting an alcoholic with a glass of whisky. Another words, torture. Looking at the clock she realised she had to get up. She had things to do anyway.

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><p><strong>Of course its Harry's child! Glad so many guessed right. If anyone has any ideas at all about how Ruth should contact Harry I'm all ears, because right now I have no idea!<strong>


	3. Chapter 3

**I seem to have got the plot bit sorted out and have been writing quicker than I expected. So I'm updating again today. Enjoy...**

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><p>It was two in the afternoon and Ruth packed her papers away on her desk. She was a part time translator for a legal company. She'd started as a lowly secretary, just answering phones every morning to try and get enough money to keep Lily in nappies, but when they'd discovered her ability to read not only French and English perfectly, but also German, Arabic and Mandarin she'd been promoted. Her Russian was getting better too. Before working there she had made sure that her legend was water tight but she had been desperate for money, and after more than two years working there, she felt relatively safe. Another bonus was they had a daycare just on the floor below her office. Ruth silently thought that the fact the owner had seven children of her own was a massive contributing factor. But she wasn't about to complain when Lily was less than thirty seconds away from her.<p>

She opened the door of the daycare and smiled as she saw her daughter trying to build a tower out of bright pink building blocks. She loved everything pink. Lily put a block on the top and the whole thing fell down. She collapsed onto the floor, looking incredibly upset. Then she saw Ruth. "Mummy!" she gasped with a fantastic smile. Lily ran to her and Ruth picked her up, hugging her tightly. "Are we going home?"

"Yes gorgeous," Ruth said. "We're going home. Do you want to go to the beach first?"

"No," Lily said firmly. Ruth smiled. Living next to the beach, there was absolutely no novelty in it.

"Lets go home then."

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><p>Walking around to her front door she was surprised to see Malcolm peering in the window.<p>

"I'm still here," Ruth said. He turned and smiled at them.

"Hi Lily," Malcolm said to the girl who was watching Malcolm with wide brown eyes. "I've got a little present for you." He got a teddy bear out of a plastic bag and handed it to Lily who was instantly smiling.

"What do you say Lily?"

"Thank you!" As soon as Ruth unlocked the door Lily ran off to play with her new toy.

"I haven't bought anything for children in a long, long time," Malcolm said. "I thought I was safe with a teddy."

"That's really sweet of you. Tea?"

"Thanks," Malcolm said, taking the same seat as the night before. "I was wondering if you had any pictures of Lily when she was younger?"

"Of course I do," Ruth said. She left the room and reappeared quickly with a large photo album. In silence Malcolm flipped through the album. The photographs were all arranged by time, starting with a newborn Lily. "She… had blue eyes when she was born?" Malcolm asked.

"Yeah," Ruth said with a smile. "She looked just like me but within about a month they turned brown and mirrored Harry's exactly. She always was beautiful though."

Malcolm nodded and continued to go through the album. The last photo showed Lily in the sea, her brown hair in long pigtails as she was laughing at the camera. "That was taken about three weeks ago," Ruth said. "When she was learning to walk, her coordination was absolutely terrible," she continued. "She loved the water so much more and found swimming wonderful. But she got there eventually."

"I can tell you one thing with complete certainty," Malcolm said closing the album. "Harry would chop his arm off to get a chance at seeing these photos."

"I know he would," Ruth said. "I want to tell him in person, it seems to be the only way that's fair, but that's impossible."

"The longer you leave it, the worse it will be," Malcolm said. Ruth nodded in agreement. "Do you want to know what I think?" he asked. She nodded again. "You should put a box of things together and write him a letter."

"You want me to explain this in a letter?" Ruth asked bewildered. "I wouldn't even know where to start!"

"That's why you should write it down," Malcolm said. "I mean this in the nicest possible way, but when you get nervous, you start to babble. You get confused over your words."

"Thanks Malcolm," she said sarcastically.

He ignored her and continued anyway. "With a letter you could draft it out. Get exactly what you want to say in the right order. You're better with written words, you know you are."

Ruth considered it for a second. "Well maybe its not a bad idea," she admitted. "When do you fly back?"

"Whenever I like," Malcolm said. "I'm having a laid back holiday so my return wasn't really set in stone."

Ruth smiled. "I'll think about it. Really, I will."

"All I ask," he said. "Thank you for sharing the photos with me." Ruth smiled as she put them back.

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><p>That evening Ruth had her feet up, thinking deeply. Lily jumped up on the sofa and looked at her mother. "Is mummy okay?" she asked.<p>

"Mummy is just fine," Ruth said, stroking her hair. "I'm just thinking about a letter I have to write." This went over Lily's head as boring grown up stuff as she snuggled into her mothers embrace. "Are you tired?"

"No," Lily said, knowing tired meant bed. Ruth knew she was lying but held her daughter close anyway without pushing it. She loved holding her child like this. A pleasure that never got boring.

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><p>Over the next few days Ruth thought about things she could theoretically put in a package to be delivered to Harry. There were so many options and the thought of telling Harry rather than scaring her, felt strangely freeing. And once she'd realised this, she knew that however difficult it was to write it down, she'd go through with it.<p>

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><p>A week later she was ready. She had reprinted extra copies of lots of photographs as well as several other things. Ruth had written and rewritten her letter to Harry so many times that she had had to burn all the rough drafts and spent more than an hour feeding the flames to destroy every scrap of evidence, but she was finally happy with her letter. Ruth placed a late night call to Malcolm's hotel room.<p>

"Is everything okay?" he asked instantly.

"Yes," Ruth said. "I have everything ready."

"I can't believe I convinced you," Malcolm said.

"Just tell him to be careful," Ruth said.

"He would be anyway, but yes I will remind him," Malcolm said. "I'll be over tomorrow to pick it up."

"Thanks," Ruth said. "Destroy it if anyone else finds it. Almost everything in there is replaceable. My daughter's safety isn't."

"Of course," Malcolm said. "You don't need to even ask."

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><p><strong>At the moment I'm working on the contents of the letter. Hope you all enjoyed the third chapter and thanks for the fab reviews! :)<strong>


	4. Chapter 4

**Thanks everyone for the lovely reviews. Sorry for the confusion, apparently fanfiction won't let people read this chapter! I do hope it was worth the wait when you get to read it.**

**Anyway here's where Harry finds out and I do hope I don't let anyone down with the content of Ruth's letter.**

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><p>Harry unlocked a door which he hadn't used for nearly ten years. A house belonging to one of his aliases was usually a good place for a meet, especially a meet he wanted no one to know about at all. He walked through to the kitchen which was at the back of the house, therefore the light couldn't be seen from the street. "What was the reason for this?" he asked, seeing Malcolm's shadow.<p>

He switched the light on. "I've been in the South of France."

"Very nice," Harry said, sitting down opposite him. "Warm. Sunny. Unlike here where its been raining constantly for a month."

"I bumped into an old friend or ours," he said. "Which is why I'm here now."

"Who?" Harry asked confused.

"Ruth."

"What?" Harry said in a quiet voice. Had he really just heard him correctly? "You saw her? How is she?"

"She's fine," Malcolm said quickly. "Anyway, there's a box of… things she wanted me to give you. And a letter. No one has seen them, I've made sure of it. And I didn't read it either."

"Where is it?" Harry asked in a whisper. He couldn't help it. The fact that her presence was so close, even just in letter form was incredible. Malcolm reached into his jacket and pulled out the envelope, handing it to Harry. The front of the envelope was completely blank but he felt his heart rate ratchet up in spite of himself. Malcolm then opened his briefcase and handed over a box, about A4 size and two inches deep. He placed it on the table and in the silence it made a loud bang as it settled there.

"I'm going to leave you alone," Malcolm said. "You know how to contact me. Just don't do anything… rash." Harry nodded dumbly, preferring to be left alone to read her words anyway. He heard the front door close and even when truly alone he was still struggling to find the courage to open, almost as if he wanted to draw it out as long as possible. To savour her words. Eventually the waiting became unbearable, so he turned the envelope over and opened it. He pulled the paper out and let it drop on the table, before with shaking hands he unfolded it and began to read her wonderfully familiar handwriting.

_Harry,_  
><em> It's been far too long since I've spoken to you. Not sure this really counts but it feels good to know you will be reading this. I'm sure you remember as clearly as I do that morning when I had to leave home. I hated going, I want you to know that. But then again, I know how much you hated watching me go too. I saw it in your eyes as the boat sailed away from you. This may be revisiting history but I have to start there. Less than two weeks later I had made my way to Paris when I made a discovery that would change my life. I found out I was pregnant.<em>

Harry dropped the letter which folded itself back up as if on hinges. She'd been pregnant when she left England. Oh God. And he knew without a shadow of a doubt that the child was his. Ruth was not and had never been the type of woman to sleep around. He knew that on that wonderful night between the two of them had been the first time in several years that she'd slept with another man. He'd just been able to tell. Not that it hadn't been incredible because it had been. Possibly perfect even. The warmth of her skin, the scent of her body as his face buried into her hair. And she had walked away from that passionate encounter pregnant? Had she kept the child? Was their son or daughter out there somewhere right now? Or had she cut all ties with her lost life. But then there was a lot of the letter left to read. He took up the letter again and returned to the point he'd just dropped off.

_I found out I was pregnant. There are two things I desperately want you to believe. Firstly, the child was yours. There hadn't been anyone else then, and there hasn't been anyone else since either. I really want you to believe that and I hope you don't doubt me. Secondly I kept the baby. I suppose if I'm being brutally honest, being on the run and hiding from everyone, a criminal who was supposed to be dead it would have been easier to have an abortion. But I just couldn't do it. Or more importantly, I wouldn't do it. I wouldn't get rid of something that was half you and half me. This whole new life was solely dependent on myself. So even though it made my life much more complicated, of course I kept the child Harry. I couldn't do otherwise._

_On the fourteenth of September I gave birth to a beautiful baby girl. She was more perfect than I could ever have imagined. She weighed seven pounds and three ounces and had brilliantly blue eyes that turned brown within the month. I called her Lily. I hope her name is okay with you, I didn't think you'd approve if I named her after one of my Greek or Roman Goddesses so I went more normal._

Harry smiled at that. He couldn't help it. He wiped a single tear away and then returned to her letter.

_She is so very beautiful, and I'm sure that if you met her you'd adore her too. But I'm not telling you so you can come around here on your white horse, Harry. In fact it's the last thing I'd want because Lily's safety has to come first. I don't know what its like in Britain or if it'll be safe for you to contact me, but our mutual friend thinks he has a way to do it. If you want to of course, I'm not expecting anything from you. Lily and I have a good life here. We manage quite well on our own so if you don't want to be involved at all, I'll accept that. But you deserved to know the truth, and our friend crossing my path was just too good an opportunity to miss._

_Anyway, I hope you're well, and that you have no more injuries. You faithfully promised me that you wouldn't get in the way of any bullets remember? There's a few photographs and other things in the box that I think you'll appreciate. I thought of you when I was collecting things for you to see and I hope they mean something to you, even if its just a fraction of what they mean to me. She really is beautiful Harry. I hope to hear from you soon._

_Ruth x_

Harry reread the entire letter three times before he felt steady enough to breathe again. Ruth had had his baby. Their baby. She'd been alone for nearly three years with their child. How had she survived it? Managed in a foreign country all alone and trying to raise their child. She was stronger than he'd ever given her credit for. He carefully folded the letter back up and put it back in its envelope. He was sure he'd read that at least a dozen times more before he went to sleep that night alone. But now he was staring at the box like it was a time bomb. Evidence of his daughter was hidden from him by only a box. It was mind boggling.

Slowly he lifted the lid and placed it next to the box. He smiled as the first photograph that caught his eyes was a newborn baby, eyes closed wearing a pink hat. Clearly still in the hospital just after she'd been born. He stroked the image of his daughter with a sad smile on his face. The next photo he thought might be his favourite image that he'd ever laid eyes on in his life. Ruth was asleep on the sofa, cradling their sleeping child who had a messy mop of dark brown hair. Lily's mouth was slightly open and her head was tilted in Ruth's direction. He loved that picture and he spent a full ten minutes soaking up every feature of the image before moving onto the next one.

Over the next two hours he looked through all the photographs that Ruth had chosen for him. It was incredible to have this window into both Ruth and his daughters lives. He put the stack of photos back and then turned his attention to the rest of the items in the box. There was a piece of paper with so many scribbled lines on that nothing apart from a blur of red and blue was discernable. He smiled, knowing it was Lily's handiwork. There was a tiny hospital bracelet in French. He read it and L Evans was clear there, along with her birthday. This was his daughter's identification while in the hospital. Her wrist had been so very small. And he'd missed it. He'd missed her birth, her first words, her first steps, and the knowledge of that made him feel hollow.

The only other thing of note in the box was a heavy silver locket. He picked it up and opened it. A lock of brown hair was held inside it. He touched it gently with his little finger. So soft. Then he snapped the locket shut, he didn't want to lose it. He safely stowed the letter in his jacket and carefully carried the box of precious photographs out to the car.

He didn't feel like he'd really breathed properly ever since he'd read that word, "pregnant." He had to be involved in his child's life. Ideally Ruth's too, but he had learnt from his mistakes with Jane. Even if nothing happened with Ruth ever again, he still wanted to be a father to their daughter. Parking outside of his house he looked at his watch, shocked to see it had already gone past one in the morning. He had spent longer than planned looking at the photographs. He decided to get some sleep and then talk to Malcolm first thing about contacting her. He simply had to.


	5. Chapter 5

**Right, after everyone struggling to read ch 4 I hope this one is easier to get hold of.**

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><p>Ruth kept refreshing her email every five minutes at work. She knew Malcolm had got back to England and he must have given Harry her letter by now. All she had to do was wait and hope that Harry still cared about her and was a good enough man to care about their daughter to contact her. Malcolm had made sure the encrypted email accounts were as safe as possible before flying back to London. Then, incredibly an email was waiting for her. She looked around but the office was completely empty. She opened the email with shaking hands.<p>

To: Rachel Evans

_Hello Rachel. It was so good to hear from you a few days ago. I was also pleasantly surprised to discover news about your extended family. She is indeed as beautiful as you claimed. Even more so in my opinion. She's her mother in miniature. She also looks very happy. I hope I'm not out of place when I ask if you are happy yourself?_

_I'm softly looking into the political climate over here at the present time. No further news on that front though. I will keep you updated if any developments occur in that area._

_From the dates you gave me, it looks like an important birthday is soon approaching. Is there a specific gift that would be appreciated? Our friend has reminded me to keep calm and not act hastily, advice which I am listening to, you'll be pleased to know. But I would still like news on you both. Waiting your reply, your friend, Peter_.

Reading it, Ruth realised that had taken a long time for him to write. Nothing was overt there, and no name was mentioned at all except their fake ones. But she felt so much relief in the attempt at communication, the first between them for years. She started typing back, but it did take a long time to create a relatively short email.

_Peter_

_I was pleased to hear from you so quickly. In relation to the birthday, anything pink would be an instant hit, I promise you. But anything you chose I'm sure would be loved by us both. Its nice to know that the person in question is being thought of by you._

_You asked if I was happy, and I am. The little one brings me a lot of joy to my life. But there was one time when I was happier in a different way. I think you will remember what time that is Peter. Or at least I hope so. And you were right. The flower of my life is indeed very happy._

_If you can, it would be nice to hear how my friends are doing from before? Are they aware of my news? Its been a long time since I heard anything at all. I was so caught up in trying to contact you that I forgot to ask our old friend. Until next time, Rachel._

Harry read the email with a smile. She was okay, that was good. They were both okay. He now had to go shopping for a three year old girl who loved pink. As well as trying to gently put feelers out to the Home Secretary. He wanted a passport for both Ruth and Lily, and the charges against Ruth to be dropped. Oliver Mace had been taken for a long vacation in South America and on the quiet it looked like he'd probably been killed out there. Either way he wasn't coming back anytime soon, much to Harry's pleasure. It was one obstacle down at any rate. As soon as he was able, he wrote another message to Ruth.

_Rachel. _  
><em> I have a little news for you today. But firstly a gift is winging its way to you, and I do hope it meets with approval from both women I'm trying to impress. The news on your friends is a little split. I'm trying not to be explicit but still let you know what happened which is proving slightly difficult. Blonde women seem to have the survival instinct down. But however, there is bad news too. Z has passed on as has AC, I'm sorry to inform you. If in the future we ever have the good fortune to meet I will let you know more. I hope you see that at present I can't. I haven't confided in anyone that I have got back in contact with you. Only the friend you met knows. One of your enemies has met an unfortunate end in South America, one that spares me little lost sleep as I'm sure it does you too. Again, sorry I can't be more specific.<em>

_I'm glad that you are happy, but selfishly I am also glad you remember the happiness of our brief time years ago. I think of my favourite flower daily, more accurately hourly. It always makes me smile, but I wish I could see it more closely rather than the unfortunate distance currently there. Do let me know whether the gift caused smiles or frowns._  
><em> Yours always, Peter.<em>

Ruth had a smile on her face, even though she had learned of the tragic demise of two of her friends. The fact that Harry thought of Lily filled her with relief. He cared. He was still the good man she remembered from old. She knew he'd never put their child in danger. She wondered if the enemy was Oliver Mace. Harry was right, that was a relief to her, if it was indeed him. But Ruth was prevented from replying to the message straight away because she had a lot of organising to do for Lily's birthday.

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><p>Harry's parcel arrived the day before her birthday. As Lily was so excited she decided to give her daughter the present early. She unwrapped the parcel and found a brightly wrapped pink present. Slightly disappointed there was nothing in there for her she handed the gift to Lily.<p>

"Can I open it?" she asked curiously.

"Of course you can," Ruth said. Then she decided to test the waters a bit. "Its from your dad."

"Dad?" she questioned with her eyes which so mirrored her fathers. "I have a daddy?"

"Yes you do," Ruth said. "He's away right now but he loves you. So he bought you this. Because you're turning three tomorrow. You're growing up."

She had a wide smile on her face when reminded of her birthday as she tore the paper off in the messiest way possible. Out popped two things. A book and a pink fluffy teddy which Lily hugged immediately. Ruth picked up the abandoned book and saw that is was children's fairy stories with a cartoon princess on the front cover. She opened the book and picked up a loose sheet of paper that had been inside.

_Ruth,_  
><em> Catherine loved it when I read these types of stories to her when she was younger. I hope Lily likes them too. It was an incredible surprise to learn of her existence but a happy one. I hope this day brings you lots of happiness. You both deserve it. Give Lily a kiss from her loving father. Best wishes, Harry.<em>

Ruth smiled at that note. It felt so good to be holding something that he'd touched. Lily was cuddling her pink fluffy teddy and Ruth smiled. She hoped that soon she'd be able to see Harry herself. That would be something special indeed.

_Peter,_  
><em> Both gifts were very well received, thank you very much. I see you took the pink hint to heart. She loved it. On another subject, I am sad to learn of the loss of our friends, but I'm grateful for the knowledge of it. I don't really have anything to add about my life here, but the thought of not replying to you was unbearable. So this message is just to keep in contact with you, and tell you that both myself and the little one are looking forward to the day when we can finally meet you again. I hope that day is soon. Do let me know any news. Thinking of you, Rachel.<em>

Harry read that and felt very conflicted. On one hand he was glad that they were both happy, but on the other he was fighting the daily temptation to catch a plane and fly to the south of France to see them. And the temptation was getting stronger. He decided he would have a meeting with the Home Secretary and try to work out a way to get her a British passport. And Lily of course. Mustn't forget the beautiful Lily.


	6. Chapter 6

"So what was so urgent that you needed to see me before my morning coffee?" Nicholas Blake asked as Harry sat on the opposite side of the desk.

"I need two British passports," Harry said without preamble. There was no point drawing it out anyway.

"Good morning world," Blake said. "Do you want to explain why, or do you just want me to turn you down straight away?"

"Do you remember Ruth Evershed?" Harry asked. Blake nodded. "She was innocent of the torture scandal. You didn't know her, you hadn't been in office that long when she was set up. She never could have condoned torture. She's been on the run ever since and I would quite like that to stop."

"I thought she was dead?" Blake said with a quirked eyebrow.

"No," Harry said shortly. He wasn't going to reveal all his secrets in one meeting after all. "I need a passport for her, and I need one for her daughter too. I want her warrant for arrest to be rescinded and all charges dropped."

"You don't want much do you?" Blake said sarcastically. "What will I get in return."

"Nothing," Harry said. "Except the fact that I would be on your side whatever may happen in the future. Plus I know enough to bring the government down at least twice over. If you don't agree I might find myself letting things slip to the media."

"You'd be put in prison," Blake said simply.

"If I don't get these passports and her freedom, I'm imprisoned anyway," Harry said. "I need them, and I have no problem with how I get them."

"You're serious aren't you?" Blake said surprised.

"Deadly serious."

"Fill out the paperwork and I'll push it through for you."

"Thank you," Harry said, the sincerity in his voice was vividly clear. "I mean it, thank you."

"She means something to you doesn't she?" Blake asked.

"Yes," Harry said, feeling it was pointless to deny it. "Do not double cross me on this one."

"I won't," Blake said. "You'll have them within the week."

"Thank you."

* * *

><p>"Come on gorgeous," Ruth said, lifting her tired daughter out of the car and into her arms "Lets get you inside and go to bed."<p>

"Mm," Lily said already half asleep. Then Ruth noticed something on her front door. It was unlocked, and she never left it unlocked. She turned back to the car and quickly put Lily down inside. She had come awake properly now and looked confused.

"I'm going to lock you in," Ruth said in her most calm voice that she could manage. "Do not open the door for anyone except me, is that okay?"

"What's wrong mummy?"

"I'm not sure," she said honestly. "Just be good, and I'll be back for you in five minutes."

"Promise?"

"Oh yes, I promise," Ruth said. Lily nodded and then settled in her seat, her head lolling on her shoulder with tiredness already. Ruth closed the car door as quietly as she could manage and then made sure the doors were locked. If someone seriously dangerous was here, it wouldn't last long but it was the only thing she could think to do with her daughter.

Very carefully she opened her front door, pulling out the knife she kept hidden in her bag, but the hallway was dark. As it had been when she left it earlier. She switched the living room light on, but that was completely deserted too. Then she went into the kitchen. As she opened the door several things happened at once. Out of the corner of her eye she saw a rush of movement and instinctively she thrust the knife in that direction.

"Bloody hell Ruth!" She dropped the now bloody knife and switched the light on. She had recognised that voice.

"Oh my God," she breathed. It was Harry. He was standing in front of her, realer than she'd imagined. Better than she'd dreamed. Apart from the fact that his forearm was bloodying his shirt fantastically. "God I'm sorry," she said, looking at the blood.

"Well, that wasn't the welcome I was expecting," he admitted, a sparkle in his eyes as he turned to the sink to run hot water over his newly inflicted wound. When she shook herself back to reality she crossed the room and helped wash the blood away. Luckily it was only a surface wound and it wasn't too deep.

"When someone breaks into my house, I react," Ruth said. She turned the tap off and then looked at him, her eyes boring into his. "What are you doing here?"

"I'm here to see you. And Lily. Where is she?" Harry looked around the empty room curiously as if she'd pop up from the floor.

"I locked her in the car," Ruth said, her lips twitching. "You scared me. I thought…"

"Sorry," he said sincerely. "Can I meet her?" The eagerness on his face was clear and Ruth smiled.

"Yeah, I'll just get her. I didn't mean to hurt you," she added, feeling slightly guilty.  
>"I know," he said. "Go and get her." Ruth smiled and left the kitchen as Harry picked up the bloody knife and washed it clean.<p>

"Come on Lil," Ruth said, picking her daughter up and heading to the door again. "You're getting heavy."

"I'm a big girl now mummy," she said tiredly. "I'm three remember?"

"Yes darling, I remember," Ruth said with a smile, trying to negotiate the doorways to the kitchen. "I know you're tired, but I want you to say hello to someone. Can you do that?"

"Mm?" she said opening her eyes and looking around the kitchen. Then she caught sight of Harry who was beaming at her. "Oh. Hello," she mumbled.

"Hello Lily," Harry said in a quiet voice that Ruth knew was masking some powerful emotions.

"Lily, this is your dad," Ruth said quietly, stroking her daughters cheek.

"The one who gave me Rosie?" Lily asked confused.

"Yes darling," Ruth said. "The one who gave you Rosie." Harry looked confused. "The pink fluffy teddy you gave her," Ruth explained. Harry nodded as Lily's eyes closed again. "Time to get you to bed."

"No," she said instantly. "Not tired."

"Lily, be a good girl and show your dad how well behaved you are," Ruth said. There wasn't really any need because Lily was almost snoring anyway. Ruth went upstairs to put Lily to bed, Harry just behind her. He wasn't sure how involved he should be. After all, to the girl he was a stranger. She didn't know him. He stopped thinking about that as Ruth tucked the duvet around Lily and kissed her forehead. "Goodnight gorgeous." Ruth turned and saw Harry watching. He moved to turn the light off but she gripped his hand and shook her head. "Don't. She'll wake if the light goes off," Ruth whispered. Harry nodded, feeling stupid. Something like that about his own daughter and he didn't know? They both sat in the kitchen and Ruth opened a bottle of whisky and poured him a measure without waiting to be asked.

"You keep whisky in the house?" he asked, thinking as he took a sip that it was a rather good one.

"Yes," she said pouring herself a glass of white wine. "But I've never drunk it. I was living in hope of strange British visitors I guess." She blushed, because the only reason she had whisky was because she'd been hoping one day to see Harry again. "Is it safe for you to be here?" she asked, her eyes wary.

"Of course it is," he replied. "No matter how much I wanted to, I wouldn't have come here if there was the slightest chance it would put either you or Lily in danger."

"Rationally I know that, but I had to ask," she said quietly. He nodded, understanding completely. "Its really good to see you."

"I'm glad I'm here," he said honestly. "Before you came at me with a knife I had planned to give you something."

"I'm sorry, but you did break in!" Ruth said, with half a smile. Harry didn't say anything but got an envelope out of his pocket and handed it to her. She looked at him curiously but then opened it. "Oh my God…" she breathed. She was holding two British passports. Her hands were shaking as she held them and opened them. "Does this mean I'm free?"

"Yes you are," Harry said with a smile. "Free to do anything you want."

"Thank you," she said sincerely. "I really mean that. Thank you."

"You never should have been made to leave," Harry said quietly.

"It kept both of us out of prison," Ruth said, putting the passports on the table. "I'd do it again."

"I know," he said. "I'd like to spend some time with Lily if that's okay?"

"You're her father, of course its okay," Ruth said with a smile. "You do… believe she's yours?"

"Ruth, what do you take me for?" he asked instantly. "You've never lied to me. I trust you. Not that it wasn't one of the biggest shocks of my life, because it was, really."

Ruth smiled her thanks. "She'll be more cooperative when she's had some sleep. She was tired today." Harry nodded. Now he was here he didn't quite know what to say to her. She looked even more beautiful than he'd remembered. And the warmer climate seemed to agree with her, eyes sparkling and a slight smile playing around her lips. Or maybe it was simply that he hadn't seen her in so long and the strength of her presence was making her seem even more attractive.

"I should go," he said quietly. "The first thing I did after landing was hire a car and drive here. I wanted to see you as soon as I could. But I should check in at a hotel."

"Stay here," Ruth said instantly. "You can watch Lily stick her fingers in the strawberry jam whenever I'm not looking at breakfast tomorrow."

"I don't want to impose," he said honestly. He wasn't exactly sure where he stood with Ruth at the moment.

"You've just given me my life back," Ruth said looking at the passports. "I think I can stretch to a roof over your head for the night."

He smiled at that. "Thank you Ruth. I'll sleep on the sofa."

"I don't bite," she said with a raised eyebrow. "Come up to bed."

"Are you sure?" he asked. Her only response was a smile as he drained his whisky.

* * *

><p><strong>Any thoughts?<strong>


	7. Chapter 7

**As you've all been so nice here's the next little bit! For all those asking for an M rated piece, I thought it a little too soon, so I had always planned for them to actually sleep in the same bed together rather than anything more. They were always so cautious I thought it more in character. (But I'm sure there will be an M part later...)**

* * *

><p>That night was not exactly a comfortable one for either of them. They were both pretty much fully dressed but Ruth slept lightly. And whenever she woke, Harry woke. They had both been spooks for too long and every little noise outside disturbed them. That and the emotionally charged atmosphere between the two of them didn't result in a decent nights sleep.<p>

Harry woke first the sunlight bright and found his hand on her waist and her head resting on his shoulder. He reluctantly pulled away from her gently and then jumped when he saw his daughter standing in the open doorway. She was sucking her thumb and had the teddy he'd given her for her birthday trailing from her other hand. "Mummy?" At Lily's voice, Ruth stirred and opened her eyes.

"Oh morning munchkin," Ruth said sitting up and smiling. Lily walked to Ruth's side of the bed and jumped up sitting close to her mother. It hurt Harry that he was effectively being ignored, but after all, Lily didn't know him yet. However Lily was staring at him with her hazel eyes as if considering whether he was worthy of her attention. Ruth was stroking her daughters hair, gently easing out the tangles as she watched Harry.

"Are you going to be here for a while?" Lily asked, her head slightly tilted.

"I hope so," Harry said, sparing only half a glance at Ruth.

"Okay then," Lily said.

"If you ask your dad very nicely, he might get your breakfast for you," Ruth said, kissing her head. She knew that Harry was slightly disappointed that he hadn't made an instant impression on Lily. But Lily was quite reserved, much like Ruth herself.

"With strawberries?" Lily asked her mother.

"Of course if you want," Harry said smiling at her, trying to win her trust.

"Okay." Lily jumped from the bed and headed downstairs.

"One slice of brown toast with lots of strawberry jam," Ruth said quickly. "No butter."

"Thanks for the tip," Harry said, quickly getting out of bed and following Lily. Ruth watched them go and even though she desperately wanted to see Harry with Lily, she thought it would be better if she stayed out of the way for a little bit. If she appeared Lily probably wouldn't interact with Harry as much. So instead she got dressed and made sure that her hair was looking good for once. Also she put some make up on for the first time in ages. Just enough to cover up the slight bags under her eyes and a touch of mascara to make sure that her eyes looked attractive. It didn't escape her notice that she was probably doing this for Harry, but she decided to push that to the back of her mind for the time being.

When the waiting became too much she quietly padded downstairs and hovered in the kitchen doorway. Lily was studying Harry carefully. "Where do you live?" she asked.

"I live in London," Harry said. "That's over the sea in the next country, in England."

"Mummy came from England didn't she?" Lily said, picking up on the word she recognised.

"Yes she did," Harry agreed.

"Mummy says I'm a proper English girl," Lily said before taking a large bite of toast. "She says I'll visit England one day."

"I'm sure you will if you want to," Harry said. "You could have a boat ride on the Thames if you like?"

"I love boats!" Lily said, her eyes sparkling and animated. "And swimming and the sea and pools!"

"So anything with water then," Harry said, pleased that he'd hit a subject she seemed to like.

"Ooh yes! Mummy took me swimming yesterday."

"I did," Ruth said making her presence known. She kissed Lily's head and turned to Harry who was pouring her a mug of coffee from the pot.

"Your coffee is truly awful," he said making her smile.

"It's a French decaf," Ruth said getting the milk out of the fridge. "I loved it when I was pregnant and just kept going once she was born."

"Okay," Harry said taking a sip of the coffee in question.

"Can I have more?" Lily asked, and Ruth felt elated that she was asking Harry rather than herself. "Please?"

"Yes of course you can," he said, putting another slice of bread down in the toaster. When Lily was busy eating her second slice Harry turned to Ruth. "So what's the fascination with water about then?"

"She was really late learning to walk," Ruth said. "I wanted to try something that might encourage her to use her legs. And she loved swimming so much from the first time I put her in the water she always did. She's like a fish."

Harry nodded and then seemed to think of something. "Ruth, can you just stay still for a second?" he asked. She froze and then closed her eyes as Harry placed a brief and chaste kiss to her lips. "She's absolutely wonderful. And so are you."

"Thank you," Ruth replied with a smile and a blush as she went about doing her own breakfast.


	8. Chapter 8

**The last bit I've written. Slow going today but I'll try and get some more up over the weekend.**

* * *

><p>"I have to go to work today," Ruth said and Harry felt a drop in his stomach. Did that mean she was planning to stay in France? Rather than go back home to London? She'd lived here for nearly four years after all, was France now home to her? He pushed these rather depressing thoughts aside when he realised Ruth had still been speaking to him. "Harry, are you listening?"<p>

"Sorry," he said shaking his head. "Got lost in my thoughts. What were you saying?"

"I usually put Lily in daycare when I'm at work, but if you want to take her for the day…?"

"Would that be okay?" Harry asked.

Ruth nodded easily. "I trust you Harry."

"What do you do?"

"I'm a translator for a legal company," Ruth said. "I only work part time but I can do the work well."

Lily walked into the living room, looking at both her parents. "Hey gorgeous," Ruth said, lifting her into her arms. "I've got to go to work today. But daddy's going to look after you for the day. Is that okay with you?"

Lily turned and looked at her father with her wide honest eyes. "Will you play with my dolls?" she asked.

"If you want to," Harry said and Ruth knew he'd do anything to try and impress Lily. "Do you have a favourite doll?"

"Yes!" Lily said happily. She started kicking her legs round in circles, wanting to be put on the floor. "Mummy let me down!" Ruth did and Lily quickly ran off to her bedroom.

"I'll be a few hours," Ruth said. "My numbers on the fridge if you need me."

"We'll be fine."

"Come on!" Lily said, her head popping around the doorframe. Harry smiled and without thinking too much about it, he kissed Ruth's cheek before following Lily upstairs.

* * *

><p>Late in the afternoon Harry, Ruth and Lily had gone for a walk on the beach. Lily had run ahead and was in her own little world while Harry and Ruth talked of more serious things. Harry had been pleased that Lily had been so animated with him during the day. Ruth was walking barefoot on the sand and Harry was trying very hard not to look at her legs which were very tempting in her sky blue knee length summer dress.<p>

"Do I want to know what you did to get hold of our passports?" Ruth asked.

"Probably not," Harry replied. After glancing at her he elaborated. "I told the Home Secretary that I'd let things slip to the media if he didn't push them through and give you your freedom."

"That would be breaking the official secrets act," Ruth said. "They'd have put you in prison."

"I didn't care," Harry said honestly.

"Harry!" she said shocked. "I fled the country to keep you out of prison! You throwing it away to clear my name kind of defeats the object!"

"If I'd known you were pregnant when you left, I'd have turned myself in anyway," Harry said. "I never wanted you to be alone when you were pregnant. The thought drives me crazy."

"I was fine," Ruth said. "Although labour wasn't easy." Harry looked at her with concern so she elaborated. "Thirty three hours before she came out. By the end I was so sick of hearing "un pas de plus" I started screaming at the French midwife."

"I should have been there with you," Harry said with regret. "I hate thinking of you going through that alone. Plus I'd have loved to have held Lily when she was born."

"You're here now," Ruth said. "How long _are_ you here for?"

"I don't know," Harry said. "As long as you want me here I suppose. I have about five years worth of holiday that have built up, so I'm here for a while."

"Good," Ruth said. "I want Lily to get to know you."

"I love her" Harry said with a smile. "Look, I wanted to give you those passports and your freedom, but I'm not expecting anything. I'm not a fool Ruth, I know you have a life here that doesn't involve me. I'm not expecting you to just leave everything and come back to England. If you stay here that will be fine. I'll fly out to see both you and Lily as often as I can. You have a life here, a beautiful house and you live next to the beach with great weather as a nice little bonus. Nothing London offers can top that. I understand Ruth, really. To be honest, I wouldn't expect you to come back now I've seen you. You've got everything you could want here."

"Harry are you genuinely stupid?" Ruth asked, stopping walking and facing him. "France may have many attractions, but it doesn't have you." Then she realised how forward she'd been and blushed. "It isn't home Harry." She reached up for him and pressed her lips to his softly. He didn't need any more incentive and deepened the embrace significantly, his arms wrapping around her and pulling her body close. The kiss went on for a long time until Ruth pulled away. "And just what do you think you're doing?" she said over Harry's shoulder. He turned and saw a cheeky smile on Lily's face as she was heading towards the ocean while her parents were busy. She looked from the water to her parents and seemed to decide that they were far enough away that they wouldn't catch her. She ran towards the ocean as Ruth rolled her eyes in exasperation and buried her face in Harry's shirt.

"Do you want me to get her?" Harry asked.

"Its pointless," Ruth said. "She'll just go straight back the second she can. Harry, I am bringing her up right I swear, she is well behaved but…"

"You're a great mother," Harry interrupted, stroking her hair.

"Mummy!" Lily called, waist deep in the water. "You're not watching me! Daddy!"

They both turned and Harry felt a lump in his throat. That was the first time she'd ever called him daddy and he felt very emotional. He duly watched as Lily splashed around in the sea and then he glanced at Ruth.

"I know what you're thinking," Ruth said. "Go on." Harry kissed her cheek softly and then joined their daughter in the water as Ruth sat on the sand and watched them playing as the sunset, feeling incredibly contented.


	9. Chapter 9

"She's fast asleep," Harry said happily coming into the kitchen. "Completely worn out."

"She is well behaved," Ruth said, trying to convince him. "Did you love water when you were younger?"

"Not particularly," Harry said. "Lily's one of a kind."

"You're drenched," Ruth said indicating his clothes.

"It was worth it," Harry said. She stood up and rested her hands on his damp shirt. Painfully slowly she unbuttoned the first button on his shirt. Then she moved her eyes upwards, connecting with his. "Ruth…" he whispered hoarsely.

"You should get changed," she said quietly.

"Mm," he said nodding. "Probably should." Their eyes were locked, not blinking and neither of them moved at all. Then it was as if a light came on in her eyes. He'd seen that look in her eyes only once before and knew what it meant. She undid another button and her fingertips rested on his skin as she reached up to kiss him. A soft gentle fabulous kiss. She drew away and bit her lip, betraying her nervousness.

"Do you want to come upstairs?"

"Badly," he admitted. She smiled and quickly left the kitchen, leaving Harry watching the space where she'd been slightly awed. But after about five seconds he followed her upstairs.

* * *

><p>Harry woke to a loud clattering on the window. "So it does rain here," he thought to himself. It was very comfortable, laying in bed listening to the raindrops on the glass with an arm around Ruth and her head laying on his chest. He should have known in retrospect it was too good to last. He groaned as his mobile phone rang. He'd left it in his trouser pocket and he moved to get it. He recognised the number and was very annoyed that the seawater hadn't damaged the phone beyond all repair.<p>

"What?" Harry barked into the phone, annoyed that the grid had called and that they'd woken Ruth who was now sitting up looking at him. "Ros, does the country simply fall apart in my absence?" Harry's eyes closed as he absorbed what she was telling him. "How is he? Oh God. Look, I'll be there as soon as I can." He disconnected the call and then looked at Ruth who had sad eyes.

"You have to go," she said simply.

"The Prime Ministers been assassinated," Harry said. "If it were anything else I'd say no but I can't."

"I understand," Ruth said with a smile. "I wish I didn't Harry but I do."

He kissed her passionately and quickly before he started to get dressed. Ruth threw her dressing gown on, knowing Lily would be awake soon. She went into her daughters bedroom and saw Lily watching her. "Morning beautiful," she said.

"Swimming with daddy was fun," she said with a gorgeous smile.

"I know sweetheart," Ruth said. "I bet you're hungry now?"

"Yes," she said.

"Come downstairs then darling." Lily followed her and was midway through eating when Harry reappeared.

"I'm so sorry," he said quietly.

"Its not your fault," Ruth said. "Anyway, it'll give me incentive to start packing and sorting everything out."

"Are you sure you want to come back to England?"

"Yes I'm sure," Ruth said firmly. "I handed in my notice yesterday." Harry looked at her surprised. "I want to go home." He kissed her cheek gently and then turned, seeing Lily watching him with wide eyes. This was going to be the most difficult thing.

"Are you going?" Lily asked in an innocent voice. Harry crossed the kitchen and picked her up, holding her close.

"I am, but just for a few days," Harry said. "Then I'm coming straight back here."

"Why are you leaving?"

"There's a problem back home," Harry said. "I have to go. But I love you lots and lots, and I will be seeing you really, really soon."

"Promise?" she asked, her eerily similar eyes boring into his.

"I swear," Harry said. "If you think I've been gone too long you can throw as much water at me as you like when I get back. That sound good?"

"That sounds like fun!" Lily said with a giggle. Harry rubbed his nose against his daughters, making her laugh again. "Bye bye daddy," she said as he put her down and Harry wondered if his heart was actually breaking because he had to leave them. Lily was focusing on her toast as he turned to Ruth.

"I'm so sorry," he said quietly.

"I know," she said with a sad smile. "Come here." He kissed her softly and slowly. "Can I have some things shipped to your house while you're gone? I need to start packing. Not that I'm assuming I'll live with you, I just need somewhere to send some of my things."

"I don't mind," Harry said with a soft look in his eyes. "Do you really want to come back?"

"You were never staying out here indefinitely Harry," Ruth said. "I was planning to go home to the UK."

Harry nodded. "I have to go," he said quietly. "Ros has organised a flight for me, I have to be on it."

"Go," Ruth said softly. Her eyes were burning and he kissed her quickly before ruffling Lily's hair as she smiled. He threw Ruth one last look of longing before quickly leaving the house. Ruth wondered if her heart had gone with him.

* * *

><p><strong>There is an M rated part to this chapter, which I'll upload later this weekend. Hope you liked this!<strong>


	10. Chapter 10

**I've come to a bit of a stopping point. I hope this chapter meets with enthusiasm!**

* * *

><p>Harry left Heathrow very annoyed at the timing of this incident, but at the same time in a rush to get to Thames House to try and sort things out. He wanted to get back to Ruth and Lily as soon as possible. Once passed the security, it didn't take long before the familiar pods were whirring around him.<p>

"God Harry, where've you been?" Ros said as she was rushed past him to her computer.

"On holiday," he said briefly, not feeling like going into the temporary life of domestic bliss he'd just lost. "What happened?"

"It looks like James Gregory hired someone to shoot the prime minister so that he could fill the gap. He was tired of being the deputy PM and knew he'd be given the top job automatically. But we can't prove it."

"What happened to the shooter?" Harry asked, heading through to his office as Ros followed him.

"Killed himself straight after taking the PM out," Ros said. "Coward. But it means we'll never get it out of him who he was hired by. He had a history of mental instability. I think Gregory knew that and exploited him."

"Bastard," Harry said. "Okay. Does the public know?"

"It was released half an hour ago," Ros said. "Beforehand they thought he was just in hospital but we had to release the information soon and a journalist let it out of the bag."

"Right," Harry said rolling his eyes. "What's the plan?"

* * *

><p>Ruth had put Lily to bed a while ago. She had been bright and hadn't missed Harry too much, but every now and then Ruth saw her turn her head as if expecting him to be watching her. But all in all, Lily had been fine. Ruth however was not. She kept thinking of Harry and all the mayhem that would have inevitably have happened in Britain after the Prime Ministers death. She had been following developments online on and off all day, checking the BBC website and Sky news. As much as she hated to admit it to herself, a part of her would have loved to have been working on the grid, which was surely awash with activity right now. Not to mention the rather large bonus of being across the room from Harry. She looked at her hands and saw that her favourite book of Greek mythology had been there for about half an hour while she was lost in thought. She snapped it shut and put it back on the shelf before going upstairs for a hot shower, and then rolling into bed.<p>

* * *

><p>She looked at the clock as the phone rang. It was one in the morning, which meant it would be only one person calling. She reached for it quickly before the noise woke up Lily. "Harry?"<p>

"I know its late," he said. "I didn't know whether to call or not."

"No, no. I'm glad you did," Ruth said. "Just hold on a minute, I want to listen out for Lily." They both fell silent and Ruth decided that the ringing hadn't woken her up because there was no movement at all. "How did everything go?"

"Is Lily okay?" Harry asked concerned.

"She didn't hear a thing," Ruth assured him. "How is everything your end?"

"A disaster," Harry said. "Not to mention leaving work and coming back to my very cold house without my two favourite people here."

"Flatterer," she said with a smile. It felt so good to hear his voice, even though he'd left only that morning.

"Are you still there?" he asked after she'd been silent for a while.

"Yes," she said tiredly.

"I'll leave you to sleep," he said quickly. "I shouldn't have called so late."

"No don't go," Ruth said quickly. "I like to hear your voice."

"Really?" he asked and she could hear the note of happiness in his voice at that.

"Yes," she said. "You can make me melt when you choose."

"I'll remember that," he said in a honey like voice which proved her point spectacularly.

"I've booked two flights to the UK," Ruth said.

"Oh that's excellent," Harry said. "When?"

"I'm not telling you," she replied. "I like to be a woman of mystery. You'll get a surprise when I turn up."

"I like surprises when they involve you," he said. "I don't expect you to sell the house you know," he added in a more practical way. "In fact keeping it in your alias will probably be a good idea in case anything untoward happens again."

"Okay," Ruth said quietly. "I don't really have anything else to say to you, but I don't want to put the phone down," she admitted.

"That's good," he replied. They stayed in the silence, listening to each other breathe, until eventually Ruth fell asleep. Harry quietly put the phone down and then turned to sleep himself.

* * *

><p>"Harry, we've got the proof!" Ros called across the grid three days later.<p>

"Tell me its easy and we can release it?" Harry said, approaching Ros and Tariq who were leaning over the same desk. Tariq pressed play and everyone was silent as a very incriminating tape was played. "Send it to every news desk in the country," Harry said when it came to the end.

"Are you sure?" Ros said. "As soon as we release it the country falls into democratic chaos because there will be no leader."

"I'm not letting a murderer run the country, no matter whatever the consequences to the political parties of the day. They'll live. Do it." Ros nodded and picked up the phone as Tariq started duplicating copies of the tape to bring out in circulation. Harry went through to his office and sat down heavily. Then the phone rang and Harry picked it up.

"What?"

"Bad day?"

"Ruth," he said softly. "Why are you calling, is everything okay?"

"Stop panicking," Ruth said firmly. "We're both fine. In fact I have someone who wants to speak to you. When she knew I had your phone number I haven't had a minutes peace. Do you have time?"

"Of course I do," Harry said with a smile.

"Come here gorgeous," he heard Ruth say. "I've got someone to talk to you."

"Daddy?" Harry overheard her say. "Yes, now take the phone," Ruth said.

"Hello?" her sweet little voice said.

"Hi sweetheart, how are you?" Harry said, feeling touched that she wanted to speak to him.

"Daddy!" Lily said excitedly. "Mummy said you were talking in the other end. I wasn't sure if I believed her, but here you are!"

"Yes darling," Harry said. "Have you been having fun with your mum?"

"Ooh yes!" Lily said. "We went in a plane daddy! And it went up and up and everything looked so small on the ground. And then we went down and down again, so much fun!"

"You went in a plane?" Harry questioned, feeling his heart soar. "Do you know where you are now?"

"Mummy, where are we?" Lily said loudly. Ruth replied but Harry couldn't hear her. "Mummy says we're at Heef Row? Is that right mummy?"

"Heathrow," Harry said with a smile. "You tell your mum that I am on my way and she is not to leave the airport until I get there."

"Daddy says he's coming and we have to stay here," Lily said cheerfully.

"I'll see you very soon sweetheart."

"Okay, bye bye daddy," Lily said and she passed the phone back to her mum.

"Which terminal are you at?" Harry asked without preamble.

"Three," Ruth replied and he could hear the smile in her voice.

"I'll be right there."

"You're busy, I know you are," Ruth countered.

"Not too busy for the two of you," Harry said quietly. "Never. I'll be there as soon as I can be."

"Bye." Harry barely waited for the phone to disconnect before throwing his jacket on and heading to the airport.

* * *

><p><strong>I couldn't bear to keep them apart for long! Thanks for all the wonderful reviews so far :-)<strong>


	11. Reunited

**Absolutely tiny chapter but I love this little bit and I hope you guys do too. Thanks for all the reviews, they really make this worth while. xxx**

* * *

><p>"I can't see him!" Lily said loudly making people in the airport turn and stare at her. Ruth smiled at her daughter and picked her up in her arms.<p>

"I'm sure that your dad will be here really soon," Ruth said. In her head she added the end of that sentence._ As long as he can get away from work_. But then she didn't really have a reason to doubt him. He'd never let her down before after all.

"But I want to see him now!"

"Lily, you've got to be patient," Ruth said slowly. "I know its been a very exciting day. What with flying for the first time."

"That was fun," Lily said with a perfect little giggle. "Daddy!" Lily cried out happily. Ruth turned and saw Harry smiling at them both. "Mummy, put me down!" Lily said. Ruth did and she ran to her father who, ignoring the twinge in his back bent down and picked Lily up.

"Hello gorgeous," Harry said holding her close and ruffling her hair.

"We went in a plane daddy!" Lily said eagerly. "So high up! Have you ever been in a plane?"

"Yes I have," Harry said happily, pleased that she seemed so happy. By this time Ruth had approached them. "Couldn't stay away then," he said to her.

"No," Ruth said simply. "I was dreading flying with a three year old, but she had the time of her life."

"So I see," Harry said. He shifted Lily to one arm and then wrapped the other around Ruth. "I'm glad you're here," he whispered in her ear. It was a wonderful three person hug, all of them so very happy, even though they'd only spent a matter of days apart. Other people walking past them in the airport smiled when they saw them. It didn't take much to see that this was a loving family being reunited.


	12. Chapter 12

**To make up for this mornings tiny chapter...**

* * *

><p>Harry parked outside his house and Ruth carried Lily inside, who seemed to have had enough excitement for one day. She was asleep. Ruth put their daughter on the sofa and tucked a blanket around her. She looked so beautiful that Ruth couldn't help the smile that formed on her own face. Harry silently nodded and Ruth followed him through to the kitchen.<p>

"I have to get back to the grid soon," he said quickly.

"I know," Ruth replied.

"Not that I'm not thrilled that you're both here because I am."

"I know," she repeated. "Calm down." He smiled at her and took a breath.

"Sorry," he said quickly. "I'm going to tell Ros and Jo that you're back. Is that okay?"

"Yes, of course," Ruth said. "I can't stay hidden forever can I?" Ruth switched the kettle on as if it was the most natural thing in the world and then turned back to Harry. "What are you going to tell them about Lily?"

"Whatever you like," Harry reassured her. "I know you're a private person, so whatever you are comfortable with. But I want you to know that I'm not ashamed or embarrassed about her. I'm as proud of her as I possibly could be."

"Thank you for saying it, but I already knew that," Ruth said. "The way you look at her. And the way you look at me when I'm holding her."

"I can't help it," he admitted. "You both take my breath away."

"Tell them whatever you like," she said returning to the subject in hand. "Tell them that Lily's gorgeous and she pouts just like her father when she doesn't get her own way."

"She is… what do you mean? I don't pout!" Harry said. Ruth's only response was to make herself a cup of tea. She didn't bother with Harry's because he wasn't going to be staying. She knew he would be needed on the grid. "Ruth, I don't pout," he said in a calmer voice.

"I wouldn't worry," she said. "Makes it very hard to restrain myself from doing this." She kissed him lightly on the lips. When she backed away he had a slightly dazed look on his face. Ruth decided to mention something that had been bothering her on the flight over to London. "I don't want to assume anything, but Lily and myself don't actually have anywhere to stay tonight. I was so focused on packing up over in France that it never occurred to me."

"I want you here," Harry said quietly. "Both of you." Harry's phone rang and he ignored it but looked at the door anxiously. Ruth nodded because she understood. "Go and check out the upstairs rooms. You might find a surprise." He let the gap between them close and brushed his lips softly over hers. Their kiss got fractionally deeper and arms started wrapping around each other. Neither were planning to let go anytime soon, but then Harry's phone rang. He groaned and the moment had gone.

"Go," Ruth said with a smile. "We'll both be fine." He kissed her goodbye and then quickly left. She waited until she heard the car drive away and then hurried upstairs. She opened the first door and her heart stopped for a moment or two. She had assumed it would have been Harry's study. Maybe it had been at some point, but it wasn't now. The walls had been painted pink and there was a single bed with a princess duvet in the corner of the room which Ruth knew Lily would love. There was a bookcase, a chest of drawers and a small wardrobe as yet empty. The majority of their possessions were somewhere over the channel right about now. Ruth smiled and at the same time wondered how Harry had managed this so quickly, especially in the diplomatic meltdown he'd been suffering through recently.

"You amazing man," she said under her breath. Then she heard a timid "mummy?"

"I'm right here," she called, going downstairs quickly. "Don't worry darling," Ruth said to Lily, who's sleepy face looked really worried. "I'd never leave you."

"Where are we?" she asked, looking at the unfamiliar surroundings.

"We're at your dads house," Ruth said. "You fell asleep in the car."

"Did we really fly? To England?"

"Yes darling," Ruth said, holding her daughter with a smile. "We did."

* * *

><p>Within the first hour back at work, Harry managed to find a free five minutes and he called both Ros and Jo through to his office. They both looked slightly worried as Jo closed the door and they sat opposite him.<p>

"Everything okay Harry?" Ros asked.

"Apart from the fact the UK government is falling down around our heads," Harry said. "Anyway, that's not why I wanted to talk to you. There was a reason I went to the south of France on holiday."

"Told you," Ros said to Jo. "Harry never just goes on holiday. There always has to be a reason."

"Stop looking so smug," Jo said with a scowl. Harry felt like he was one step away from saying "calm down children," but he refrained.

"I went after Ruth," Harry said.

"You found her?" Jo asked with bright eyes. Jo had always been fond of Ruth.

"How is she?" Ros asked

"She's back here in London," Harry said. "She's really well. But there's another reason I'm confiding in you two. I don't know if she wants to work here again or not, but I think you'll probably see her around at some point. Which brings me to the other secret she's been keeping. Ruth has a three year old daughter. Or I should say, Ruth and I have a three year old girl. Lily." A part of Harry wished he could photograph the stunned look of shock on both of their faces. It would be good to look back on.

"I don't believe it," Jo said, shaking her head slightly. "After all this time and I discover that I owed Zaf two hundred quid before he died."

"Excuse me?" Harry said indignantly.

"It was only a matter of time, Harry. We all knew that." But this was said by Ros instead of Jo. "Congratulations Harry."

"Er yeah," Jo said, trying to get over her shock. "Congratulations."

"Please don't let Ruth know you were gambling on her private life," Harry said. "That would upset her and I don't want that."

"Of course," Jo said. "We just wanted her to be happy Harry."

"She is happy," Harry said. "Or at least I think so."

"Good," Jo said.

"I trust that you will delicately spread the news," Harry said. "No one else here knows her, but I don't want her to be the sole of attention here, if and when she turns up at Thames House. You know how much she'd hate that as well as I do."

"Harry, no one will care except you," Ros said. "To everyone else, she'll just be another face on the grid. It won't matter."

"I do appreciate you telling us though," Jo said. "Its nice to know she's safe."

"Well, best get back to work then," Harry said. The two left his office, talking under their breath while Harry opened his wallet and stared at a picture of Lily. He smiled, and he knew that tonight, he'd get home on time to be with both of the women he loved.

* * *

><p>"I didn't expect that," Ros admitted. "Ruth pregnant. God."<p>

"I know," Jo replied. "I don't know how she coped. It must have tortured her to be away from Harry and home anyway. Add to that a child that couldn't see its father…"

"Mm," Ros said.

"It is good news though. I mean look at Harry right now," Jo said. Ros did and then saw what Jo meant.

Ros sighed before speaking. "The political climate of Britain is being flushed down the toilet, we have no government, no leader and riots are starting in East London. So what does Harry Pearce, head of counter terrorism do in these trying times?"

"He's smiling," Jo said. Ros allowed herself a small smile too, before getting back to work and trying to get the police to break up the mobs before they got too drastic.

* * *

><p><strong>Thanks to all reviewers, and thanks to the people who have added this story to their alert list too. Love knowing that people are waiting for the next chapters!<strong>


	13. Chapter 13

**I don't really know how much more of this is left to go, but I will keep trying to write more as long as people want it.**

* * *

><p>Ruth had just finished unpacking their belongings that they had taken with them when the front door opened, followed by a loud "daddy!" Smiling, Ruth went downstairs to find Harry holding their daughter.<p>

"You're early," Ruth said.

"I was determined to make it home in good time tonight. Plus we've managed to persuade the conservatives to play nice with labour for a little while, so that's bought us some time."

"Good," Ruth said fervently. "What's in the bag?" she asked, just having noticed a plastic carrier on his arm.

"I remembered on the way home that I didn't have any jam for breakfast tomorrow," Harry said, putting Lily back to the floor where she promptly ran off. "So I bought some before coming home."

"That's sweet," Ruth said with a smile. "How did Ros and Jo take my reappearance?"

"Well," Harry said. "Jo especially looked pleased you were safe and happy. Are you… happy?"

"Yes," she said, her eyes burning quietly. "I am happy." She sealed the statement with a quick kiss. "Lily? Did you tell them?"

"I did," Harry said. "You would have loved to have seen the shocked looks on their faces, it was quite amusing. They both said congratulations once they'd got over it though."

"Good," Ruth said. "I wondered if I could come on the grid for a couple of hours tomorrow?"

"Of course, why?"

"I want to hack in and officially change Lily's name. It'll be easier to hack in then filling out endless forms. I don't want her to be living under my alias for the rest of her life."

"I understand," Harry said quickly. He didn't want that for his child either.

"If its okay with you, I was planning on changing her last name to Pearce," she said anxiously. "If its not, that's fine," she carried on quickly. "Don't worry, I just thought…" She was stopped when Harry kissed her passionately. Her worries faded away in the intensity of that kiss. Exasperation filled her when she felt Lily tugging on her skirt, clearly not wanting to be ignored any longer.

Ruth parted from him reluctantly and then crouched down on Lily's level.

"Where's Rosie?"

"I put her on your bed," Ruth said. Lily hurried upstairs. "How did you get her room done so quickly?" she asked Harry.

"Incentive," Harry said. "I wanted it ready for her, but I must admit, I paid someone to paint the walls. I didn't have the time to do it myself. I'm sure there will be times when I let her down. I just want her to know I love her." Lily came back into the kitchen, Rosie trailing from her hand before Ruth could reply.

"Daddy, will you play with me?" Lily said. "Please?" she added catching her mothers eye.

"Of course," Harry said, feeling his heart warm at the look Lily was giving him.

* * *

><p>Later that evening when Lily had been put to bed Ruth wasn't concentrating on anything much, Harry could tell. She sat on the sofa, and the TV was on but she wasn't paying any attention. Her eyes had that slightly glazed look whenever she was deep in thought. Harry sighed and switched the TV off before turning to her. The absence of sound seemed to break through her reverie and she looked at him.<p>

"What's wrong?" he asked quietly. "And don't say nothing, something is bothering you. I know it is."

"I don't know how to put it into words," Ruth said as he pulled her against his chest, her head resting there as he stroked her hair. "Its just a feeling I have that something is going to go wrong."

"Why would you think that?"

"Because in my life, it usually falls apart just when I've become happy," Ruth said honestly. Harry felt a stab of annoyance when he thought about what a hard life she'd had. And their… relationship hadn't exactly made things easier for her either. He kissed her hair before tightening his arms around her waist.

"Its not going to go wrong," Harry assured her.

"There's something I want to ask you," Ruth said quietly. "I don't know if its my place, but the curiosity is driving me mad."

"Go on," Harry said when she fell into silence.

"When I was in France, was there… anyone else?" She turned so she could face him but the silence told its own story. "Oh."

"Its not what you're thinking," Harry said.

"You don't know what I'm thinking," Ruth replied quietly.

"Zaf's body had just been found at the time," Harry said. "I saw the pictures and it was horrific. Things that you couldn't imagine happening to anyone. I had to see those pictures but it was awful. So that night I went to a bar and drowned my sorrows."

"You don't have to explain," she said quietly.

"I do," he replied. "I owe you the truth." She nodded and he continued. "I'd been there maybe two hours when a blonde woman approached me. What got to me was that she had blue eyes just like yours. I'd spent the last few hours thinking about all the officers and friends I'd lost, and this vivid reminder of you… Well it made me down another whisky very quickly. Anyway, there isn't a nice way to say it. I had a one night stand with her, and I never saw her again. It wasn't anything special, to be honest its just a drunken blur now. It was just sex. I'm sorry."

"Why are you apologising?" she asked. "For all you knew you'd never see me again."

"Because it isn't something I'm proud of," Harry said. "Even if you'd died before I saw you again, I still would feel guilty.

"I have another why then," Ruth said quietly. "Why are you telling me? I'd never have found out."

"I make my living out of spying and lying to people. I don't lie to you," Harry said firmly. "I never have and I never will. No matter how uncomfortable the truth may be."

"Thank you," Ruth said honestly. "I never expected you to sit around and wait for me."

"Apart from that night I did," Harry said. "I was so disappointed in myself. I still am to be honest. For you… was there…?"

"No," she said quietly. "I did go on a few first dates," she said. "But every one of them… disappointed me. Mainly because they weren't you. And you were who I wanted. Always." Harry leaned over her and kissed her softly.

"I'm sorry," Harry said when their lips parted. "Really."

"I'd rather you had a one night stand than a year long relationship to be honest," she said. "I do appreciate you telling me the truth though." He kissed her again, filled with intent this time. His hands slid slowly up from her waist, over her ribcage and up to her bra.

"Upstairs?" he said in a soft voice that betrayed how much she meant to him as his thumbs ran over her skin suggestively.

"I thought you'd never ask." She smiled as she got up from the sofa and headed to Harry's bedroom. He followed her very quickly.


	14. Chapter 14

Harry was awake. It was nearly six in the morning and he couldn't sleep. If someone had told him six months ago he'd be lying next to a naked Ruth, he would have had difficulty believing them. But this was real, he reminded himself. She really was lying next to him, her feet tangled with his, her light breathing gently disturbing her own hair. He treasured these moments, because she was so unaware of how beautiful she was and her effect on him. He slowly trailed his fingers over her collarbone, so softly that she wouldn't wake. He ached to touch more of her but he restrained himself. She really was an amazing woman, he thought.

"I know you're watching me," she breathed, stretching her back slightly.

"I didn't want to wake you," Harry said quietly.

"I've been a mother too long," Ruth said. "I wake up early almost everyday now. You were staring."

"Just thinking how beautiful you are," he said honestly. "I love you."

"You've never told me that," she said quietly, her blue eyes sparkling at him. "You've never said the words before."

"That's ridiculous," Harry said, shaking his head.

"You've told me you love Lily, but you've never said it to me."

"Well, I have now," he said, deciding to stop arguing the point. "I love you."

"I know."

"You just said…!"

"Harry, you never told me," Ruth said quietly. "It doesn't mean I didn't know. Love doesn't always need words. But for the record I love you too." She brushed her lips lightly over his and the kiss became deeper very quickly. "Harry," she said, pulling back as his hands started wandering. "No, we don't have time."

"Sure we do," he said. And after two seconds, she forgot why she'd been arguing in the first place.

* * *

><p>Later that day Ruth arrived on the grid, holding Lily's hand tightly. She was looking around awestruck at the new surroundings.<p>

"Ruth!" She turned and saw Jo smiling at her. Then her eyes were drawn lower to Lily, who was sucking her thumb, her head tilted and her brown eyes surveying Jo with curiosity. "Hello," Jo said to the little girl. Lily turned and buried herself in her mothers skirt. "Oh, she's shy," Jo said looking back at Ruth. "How are you?"

"Good," Ruth said. "Its nice to be home."

"So, you and Harry then?"

"I thought that might come up," Ruth said with a smile, following Jo back to her terminal as the blonde sat down. "We didn't plan it."

"The two of you couldn't plan anything," Jo said. "You were hopeless."

"Thank you," Ruth said sarcastically. She pulled up a chair next to Jo and then lifted Lily onto her lap, who seemed to have got over her sudden bout of shyness and was staring at Jo again.

"Who are you?" Lily said, her face screwed up in confusion.

"My name's Jo. I'm an old friend of your mums." Lily looked at Ruth, as if confirming this and she nodded at her.

"Okay," Lily said. "You said daddy was here!"

"Shall we go and have a look?" Ruth said. Lily nodded. "I'll be back in a minute," she said to Jo. "Come on sweetheart." Ruth walked through and knocked once on Harry's office door, being thrown back to years ago when she'd never bothered knocking. She opened the door and watched Harry for a second.

"Have you got a minute?" Ruth asked

"Yes," he said. "Everything okay?"

"Someone wanted to see you," Ruth said a second before Lily bounded into the room.

"Daddy!"

"Hello gorgeous," Harry said, a bright smile filling his face. Lily jumped up and very quickly she was sitting in Harry's lap, looking at his desk. "Do you want to do some drawing? Lets see what you can destroy…"

"You don't have to look after her," Ruth said quickly. "I know you're busy."

"Ruth, I don't mind, so do me a favour and shut up." He said it with a light tone which made her smile. Harry handed Lily a pencil and she quickly started scribbling on the back of a form he'd given her. Ruth turned and quietly shut the door, heading to the spare computer next to Jo.

"She's beautiful," Jo said.

"I know," Ruth said smiling. "I adore her. So does Harry."

"Did he know you were pregnant?"

"No," Ruth said. "I didn't know myself until after I had to leave."

"He's taken to it well?" Jo asked with a hint of a question.

"Yes," Ruth replied. "He loves her."

"She's got Harry's eyes," Jo said.

"I know," Ruth said. "For the past few years whenever I looked in her eyes a part of me saw him. Anyway, I need to get on."

"Are you working here again?"

"No," Ruth said. "I'm changing Lily's last name, it'll be so much quicker here." Jo nodded and they fell into silence as she got to work.

* * *

><p>"Done."<p>

"That was quick," Jo said.

"I guess I haven't lost my touch," Ruth said with a smile. "I'll go home. Just get Lily and I'll leave you in peace." Jo smiled but then got distracted by an email that had just come in. Ruth turned just as Ros came through the pods.

"Ruth," she said, unable to completely mask her surprise. "Did Harry bring you back to work already?"

"No, I just needed to use the network for a little while," Ruth said.

"No one else can bring personal matters to work," Ros said with a raised eyebrow. "But I guess sleeping with the boss helps."

"Ros!" Jo said loudly before Ruth could so much as blink.

"I'm sorry," Ros replied almost sounding sincere. "That was unkind. It is good to see you."

"Thanks for that rather twisted greeting," Ruth replied not sure where that had come from.

"Bad day," Ros said with a sigh. "I found one of my assets murdered earlier this morning. Really, I'm glad that you're okay."

"Thanks Ros." Ruth said. She walked through to Harry's office and smiled when she saw Lily on the floor, drawing over what looked like a paper factory explosion while Harry was on the phone, but keeping a close eye on her at the same time. It only took a couple of minutes for him to put the phone down. "You finished?" he asked.

"Yeah, its all done. I'm going to take Lily home."

"But mummy!"

"No buts," Ruth said. "Your dad's got to work." She pouted at Ruth in a way that melted her heart even when she tried to stay firm.

"Alright I see your point," Harry admitted. "She does pout." Ruth smiled at Lily who realised she wasn't going to get her own way and got up, walking towards her mum.

"Bye bye daddy," she said quietly.

"You be a good girl for your mum alright?" Lily nodded and then gripped Ruth's hand tightly.

"I'll see you later."

"Yes," Harry said fervently. Then he turned as his phone rang and picked it up. Ruth carried Lily who still looked around the grid with amazement before going into the pods, which Lily found very amusing.

"Come on Lily Pearce. Lets get you home."

* * *

><p><strong>Any suggestions where to go from here?<strong>


	15. Chapter 15

"Tomorrow I am taking you out to dinner." Ruth turned around, convinced she'd misheard him.

"I'm sorry?"

"I am taking you out to dinner," he repeated. He was currently lying in bed, watching her as she took her makeup off and brushed the tangles out of her hair.

"Have you forgotten about Lily?" Ruth said.

"No," Harry replied. "Jo's offered to baby-sit. And I think its about time I took you out. Somewhere special." Ruth turned the bathroom light off and considered it. She couldn't deny that the thought of having a night off was enticing. Add to that the idea of a lovely meal in Harry's company and she couldn't really see why she was hesitating.

"That sounds nice," Ruth said with a smile, getting into bed.

"Good," he said. "Just what I wanted to hear." He turned on his side so he could hold her, and he pressed a lingering suggestive kiss to her neck before she shifted slightly.

"No, not tonight Harry," she said.

"Okay." He kissed her cheek with a slight smile and then closed his eyes without another word. She watched him in surprise. She had expected him to try and persuade her, and probably succeed in changing her mind. Her previous experience had told her that men didn't usually understand the meaning of the word no when it came to sex. But then she also knew that Harry was unlike any other man she'd ever known. She settled back down in bed and stroked his back once.

"I love you," she whispered sincerely.

"Mm," he said, already nearly asleep. "Love you too."

* * *

><p>Ruth felt very grateful that the next day the rest of their belongings arrived from France. She needed something special to wear tonight. She found the box with her clothes and quickly went through it, deciding that unless she went shopping, she only had one option. A knee length black dress with a slightly more revealing neckline than she was used to. Meaning that she'd hardly ever worn it and she couldn't remember when she'd bought it, not to mention never having an occasion to wear it either. After making sure that Lily was busy (currently watching TV and cuddling Rosie) she tried the dress on. It was actually a little too big for her, which meant she'd lost weight. She tied a thin black belt around the middle and then walked into the bathroom to study her reflection. Not bad, she thought critically as she turned on the spot. As she walked around, the skirt flared up slightly and she bit her lip as she thought about Harry's reaction to that. Her arms were completely bare and the neckline accentuated her breasts well but subtly. She now remembered why she'd treated herself to this. Because, even if she said it herself, it looked really good on her. She took the dress off, not wanting to ruin it before tonight and then started looking for shoes to match.<p>

* * *

><p>Harry was watching over Lily as Ruth was getting dressed. Jo was due any minute but Lily was busy chattering a mile a minute about what her teddy's and dolls had got up to that day. Harry was just nodding instead of trying to keep up with her vivid imagination. Then the doorbell rang and Lily raced into the hall, Harry just behind her.<p>

"Thanks for this Jo," Harry said as the blonde came in the house a smile on her face.

"No problem," Jo said. She crouched down and picked Lily up who had gone silent. "I'm going to be looking after you tonight," Jo said happily.

"But mummy and daddy?"

"They'll be back later," Jo said. Lily turned to her father who nodded.

"Of course we will sweetheart," Harry said. Lily decided her dad wasn't lying and she kicked in Jo's arms to get down to the floor. She promptly ran off leaving Jo and Harry in the hall. "She's been fed, just put her to bed in half an hour or so."

"Sure," Jo said with a smile. "She's beautiful."

"Yes she is," Harry agreed as they went through to the kitchen. "Ruth'll be down in a minute." No sooner had Harry spoken than they heard her descending the stairs.

"I know Lily," Ruth said patiently around the corner. "Jo's going to look after you while your mum and dad go out, okay?"

"Will Jo play with Rosie?" Lily asked.

"Ask her nicely and I'm sure she will." Ruth came into sight through the kitchen door and Harry's mouth went dry. She was a vision. That dress was simply perfect for her. Showing her off perfectly, but not too much. Ruth smiled at the speechless reaction he had and felt pleased and relieved. "Shall we go?"

"Absolutely."

* * *

><p>Throughout their dinner he hadn't been able to keep his eyes off of her. She looked beautiful, radiant and above all, happy. Harry felt like he could have simply kept her at home in the bedroom, because she was so irresistible. And Ruth had a slight smile on her lips as if she knew what he was thinking. By the time dessert had appeared at their table, Ruth's foot had slipped out of her shoe and was teasing him under the table cloth. He wondered where this bout of confidence had come from. Or maybe it was simply that his eyes kept popping out of his skull whenever he looked over her incredible figure. He wondered how e could concentrate on eating when her toes were making him squirm. The moment was broken by his mobile phone ringing. She sighed in disappointment as he took it out of his jacket. The confusion on his face made her heart drop. Was this the end of their perfect evening?<p>

"I'm sorry," he said quickly answering it. "Yes?" Ruth watched his face in sadness. She should have known it was all too good to last. "What!" Harry said loudly enough that several other tables turned and tutted at him. "No, no. Of course. Right. I'll be there as soon as possible. Yes. No, its not your fault. Bye."

"We have to go," he said seriously as soon as he put the phone back in his pocket.

"What is it?" Ruth asked in trepidation. Harry paused before speaking, not knowing how to say the next sentence. He looked into her blue eyes and spoke before he could stop himself.

"Someone's taken Lily."

* * *

><p><strong>Don't hate me! I couldn't think of any nice way to keep the story going, so I added a bit of drama. Thanks for all the reviews so far :-)<strong>


	16. Chapter 16

**Oddly enough this has been the easiest chapter to write of the whole story so far. Unhappy thoug the content is...**

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><p>Harry was on the phone while driving which was stupid and dangerous but Ruth was beyond being able to hold up her end of a conversation. He put the phone down on the dashboard. "It looks like Jo will be okay," Harry said.<p>

"What happened to her?" Ruth asked quietly. Her first words since he'd told her what happened to Lily.

"She tried to stop them from taking Lily. She's got two broken ribs and a fractured right arm for her trouble. But it looks like her ribs didn't puncture her lung, so that's something." Ruth nodded in the silence, unable to think of words. "This isn't her fault," Harry said, wishing the traffic would move so they could get to Thames House quickly.

"I know," Ruth said quietly.

"They won't hurt her," Harry said. Then Ruth looked at him with a glare. "Not yet at any rate."

"I know that too," Ruth said. "They'll want something first. She must be so scared. She doesn't like strangers at the best of times, and we told her that we'd be coming right back for her." She looked at her hands. "Oh God Harry!"

"She will be fine," Harry said firmly.

"Harry, you can't possibly know that!" Ruth cried out. "They are going to kill her if they don't get whatever it is they're after. I can't have done this to her. I can't have left her to get kidnapped. Oh God."

"I am personally going to murder the bastards who have done this," Harry said, feeling relief as Thames House came into view. "That's how I know she's going to be okay."

"Don't take this the wrong way, but right now that doesn't fill me with a lot of reassurance."

"I know," he said. He gripped her hand tightly as he drove into the car park. "Ros, Tariq, Lucas and Dimitri are on their way in. I told them they were sacked if they didn't come in."

Ruth allowed herself a tiny smile at that. "Thanks." She was silent from that point on until she sat at her desk and started getting the security camera feeds from outside Harry's house. He went through to his office and shut the door promptly. He leaned his head against the wood and closed his eyes. His chest felt very tight and he was finding it difficult to breathe. If anything happened to Lily because of his job, he would never forgive himself. He had never so badly wanted a whisky, but he refrained. He would need a clear head tonight.

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><p>He came back on the grid when everyone else had joined them. He'd been going through the databases, trying to work out who could possibly have taken Lily and why. He wasn't having much luck. Ruth's face had streaks of tears down her cheeks even though she wasn't crying at the moment. "Anything?"<p>

"Four men came into the house," Ruth said quickly. "Er, they didn't speak so we don't have an accent but they're white and Dimitri's running the face recognition right now."

"How is she?"

"She was sleeping when they took her," Ruth said. "Which I suppose is better than her screaming. Tariq's running the number plate of the van they put her in."

"Don't panic," Harry said. Whether he was talking to himself or her, he didn't know.

"Harry, I am so far past panic its unreal," she said. "Telling me not to panic at this point is the same thing as telling me not to breathe, do you understand me?"

"Yes," he said. "I want her back too," he gently reminded her.

"I know," she said. "I feel like my hearts been ripped out." He squeezed her hand gently and then they both jumped as a desk phone rang. Harry picked it up after Tariq nodded as he started to run a trace.

"Yes?"

"Do we have your attention yet?" Harry knew that voice. He couldn't quite place it, but it definitely rang a bell in the back of his mind.

"Where's my daughter?" Harry said while his brain tried to place the mans voice.

"She's safe," he said. "For now.

"I promise you, if you hurt one hair on her head, I will not stop until I have found you and put a bullet through your brain. And that's the fast death if I'm feeling generous."

"Oh, so I have got your attention. Good," the man said.

"What do you want?" Harry said plainly.

"Getting straight to the point, I like that," he said while Harry suddenly realised who it was. "I want a file which I believe you are very familiar with. The Evergreen file."

"I want proof you haven't harmed her first," Harry said.

"Check Miss Evershed's old email account. When she used to work for MI5. I'll call again in thirty minutes." There was nothing left on the line except the dull disconnected sound.

"Tariq?"

"North London. Couldn't get closer."

"Keep working on it."

"Who is it Harry?" Ruth asked. "I know you recognise that voice, I can tell."

"Its Phillip Mace."

"Oliver's brother?" Ruth said. "Oh dear God. What's the file he's after?"

"We can't give it to him Ruth."

"What is it?" she repeated in a quiet voice.

"It's a map basically," Harry said. "To where Britain is secretly keeping two weapons of mass destruction. No one except high government officials are supposed to know about it. I guess Oliver couldn't keep his mouth shut."

"Where is it?" Ruth asked.

"No," Harry said. "I won't tell you, because you'll get it straight away."

"She's our daughter Harry," Ruth said firmly. "Are you telling me you aren't going to do everything you can to get her back?"

"He won't hurt her," Harry said.

"That doesn't answer my question," Ruth said. They both glared at each other and became painfully aware that everyone was watching them. They both went to his office straight away.

"You aren't going to give it to him?"

"No I'm not," Harry said, hating the look of disgust he saw in her eyes. "He won't hurt her."

"There's no way you could know that," Ruth said. "You have no idea what he will do."

"What would killing Lily achieve for him, really?" Harry said. "He would have nothing, no leverage over us, and the knowledge that I will hunt him down and kill him very, very slowly and painfully. Her death gets him nothing."

"How can you be so clinical?" Ruth asked, the shock clear all over her face. "This isn't just another random terrorist holding captives. This is our daughter! And you're just thinking about it like everyone else? How is that even possible?"

"Ruth, we'll be able to track him down. Lily won't be hurt, I'll make sure of it."

"You have no control over that at all," Ruth said. "What if he works out you're after him and decides Lily is no more use to him? What if he just kills her so he can escape? Where is the file?"

"I can't Ruth," he said quietly. "I just can't."

"If you don't give it to him, to save your daughters life, I will never forgive you." She said it so quietly and with such power in her voice that he knew he'd done irreparable damage to their relationship.

"I can't," he whispered. "I'll get her back Ruth, I promise I will. But not this way."

She looked at him as if she'd never truly seen him before, the loathing and disgust in her eyes was so clear. "When this is over, if by some miracle she's still alive, I never want you to come near myself or Lily ever again. Do you understand?"

"Ruth…"

"Do you understand?" she repeated with ice in her voice. He nodded once and she left his office, slamming the door shut as she went. He closed his eyes and wondered how it was possible for his world to fall apart in the space of a few hours.


	17. Chapter 17

**Well, I didn't want to leave you in suspense too long, so I am getting this written as soon as I can. Enjoy!**

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><p>The time was nearly up and Ruth was staring at the phone, waiting for it to ring again. As instructed she'd checked her old email account and there were pictures of Lily. She was half asleep clutching Rosie to her chest and Ruth felt relieved that nothing more sinister had happened to her. Yet at any rate.<p>

"I've got the possibilities down to four locations," Dimitri said as Ruth turned to face him. "We've been looking at properties that Mace or his family have been involved in, but still fit to where Tariq traced the call."

"Right," Ruth said, trying to keep as calm as possible.

"She'll be okay," Dimitri assured her. Ruth ignored him and continued work on the face recognition. Ros was doing it, but Ruth needed to do something to make her feel like she was getting Lily back.

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><p>Harry braced his hands against the door and was struggling to breathe. The world felt like it was slipping in and out of focus. He absently wondered if this was what a panic attack felt like. He knew Ruth was incredibly angry with him, but he also knew her overriding emotion was total fear for their daughter. He hoped that with time she would forgive him, in spite of what she had said earlier. As much as he wanted to worry about Ruth, he couldn't at the moment. He had to give Lily his full attention. Hearing a distant ringing in his ears he quickly left his office, to see Ruth's eyes wide with fear as she stared at the phone.<p>

"Where is she?" Harry asked when Tariq indicated it was okay to speak as the second trace was now working.

"Patience," Mace said with a hint of amusement in his voice. "Have you got the Evergreen file?"

"What are you going to do with it?" Harry asked.

"None of your business," Mace said. "Have you got it?"

"Yes," Harry lied. "But you are not getting it until I see my daughter with my own two eyes."

"I suppose that's fair," Mace conceded. "But just before I give you my location, you should know that I have a mole inside the security services, monitoring every phone call made. If you try to call in Special Forces, CO19 or any police presence at all, I will shoot your daughter and then vanish, is that clear?"

"You'd kill an innocent child?" Harry asked, trying to ignore the look on Ruth's face and the fear clutching his own heart.

"If I had to," Mace said. "So do yourself a favour, and keep your word."

"Where are you?"

"Thirteen Granstead street."

"I'm on my way."

"You have thirty minutes."

"I need more time," Harry said, knowing that part of north London was quite a way from Thames House.

"Forty five minutes then. Do hurry. I'm not a patient man." The line went dead.

"He's telling the truth," Tariq said. "I managed to trace it, he's definitely there."

"Right, Lucas and Dimitri I want you with me. Ros, work with Tariq to find out who's watching the network so we can't call back up." Ros nodded, knowing arguing was pointless. Ruth looked at Harry, wondering if he was going to mention her. "Would you stay here if I told you to?" he asked her, correctly interpreting the look she gave him.

"No."

"Exactly," he said simply. "We don't have time, lets go." Ruth nodded and they all left Ros and Tariq alone.

* * *

><p>Harry and Ruth were sitting in the silence as he drove. Dimitri and Lucas had chosen to drive a separate car, as no one had wanted to get in between the worried parents. "Look under the passenger seat. There should be a memory stick there." Ruth did and picked up the USB, peeling the tape off.<p>

"What's on it?"

"Nothing, its blank but it has a lot of encryption so it'll take them a while to figure that out."

"Okay," Ruth said. The silence got very uncomfortable between them and she felt like she had to speak to break it. "I don't agree with you here."

"I think you made that perfectly clear," Harry said as he turned right, following Tariq's directions sent through to his sat-nav.

"But I was wrong about one thing," Ruth said. "No matter how angry or upset I am, I'll never keep Lily from you. I shouldn't have said that."

"Thank you," Harry said quietly, looking at her for a second before returning his attention to the road.

"Do you really think this will work?" Ruth asked.

"Its our best shot," Harry said. "I'd rather they took me and tortured me to death than take her. If it doesn't work, I'll offer myself, and they can sell me on to whoever wants me. I'm sure someone will. The Russians maybe. Or Chinese. They'll get their money for me."

"Harry, they will kill you."

"I don't care," he said. "As long as she's safe." She saw the sincerity in his words and felt herself softening towards him.

"You think this is what its about?" Ruth asked. "Money?"

"Yes," Harry said swiftly. "Phillip Mace wouldn't want to blow anything up. He doesn't have the guts or the conviction to see it through. He'll be selling it on."

"I'm scared Harry," she said quietly.

"So am I," he admitted. He looked into her eyes for a moment, before turning back to the road once more. "We're nearly there."


	18. Chapter 18

**Reviews dipped for the last chapter, so I hope this one is better received! Thanks to all those who did review. I'm making it up as I go along, so its nice to know someone's enjoying the drama!**

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><p>Harry parked a street away, waiting for Lucas and Dimitri to catch up. They'd got separated in traffic and they still had twenty minutes left on the clock. "Will you do me a favour?" Harry asked as he switched the engine off. The silence was as loud as possible.<p>

"What?" she asked.

"Stay here."

"Not a chance in hell," she said quickly.

"Please," Harry said. "Let me explain. At the moment I want one person to come out of there alive. Heartless as it sounds, I don't care about anyone else, including myself. I'm only concerned with Lily. If you're there, they'll be double the people I'm worried about. I don't want anything bad to happen to you, but there's only one of me."

"Harry…"

"I mean it. Please, stay in the car. If all goes as planned Dimitri or Lucas will bring Lily to you, while I deal with the scum who took her in the first place." Harry fell silent as he saw that she was seriously thinking about it. He didn't want to say anything to disrupt her thinking.

"Drive closer," she said. "I want to be right outside the house. It's the only way I'll agree."

"Okay," Harry said. He leaned over, planning to kiss her but she turned her head away from him and he felt his heart drop. "Ruth…"

"No," she said simply. "If she's hurt because of your refusal to compromise… I don't know how I would even begin to react. So don't try to kiss me."

"Sorry."

"What are you sorry for?" Ruth said quietly, her blue eyes condemning him instantly. "For trying to get our daughter back by handing over a fake USB? For risking her life?"

"Lets just get this over with shall we," Harry said as he saw Lucas's car in the mirror, choosing not to answer her question. Because he couldn't cope with anymore of her disappointment in him. Not now when things were so fragile anyway.

"I'll stay in the car," Ruth said. "Get her to me as soon as you can." Harry turned the engine back on and followed to the correct address, Lucas right behind him.

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><p>"Get her back for us," Ruth said firmly as Harry left the car. His only response was a nod. She must trust him to agree to wait in the car, a thought which cheered him marginally.<p>

"Ruth?" Dimitri asked.

"She's waiting outside," Harry said as they approached the door of what looked like a normal house from the outside.

"How did you manage that?" Lucas asked.

"Apparently she still trusts me," Harry said as he rang the doorbell. The door opened and they were confronted by two men holding guns who led them through to the kitchen in silence. Phillip Mace was sitting at the table and he looked faintly amused as Harry came in.

"You brought company," he said.

"So you keep your word," Harry said. "It wouldn't do for you to just shoot me would it? Where's Lily?"

"Where's Evergreen?"

"You are not getting it until I have my daughter safely in my arms," Harry said.

"She's asleep," Mace said.

"I don't care, give her to me," Harry said simply. Mace nodded to one of the guards who left the room.

"Where's the file?" Harry put his hand in his jacket pocket and held the memory stick out. Mace went to reach for it out of instinct.

"Not going to happen," Lucas said before Harry could even say a word. There was a silence only punctuated by the intensity of the stares between the men. Mace quietly got his laptop, waiting for the memory stick to be handed over, eyes boring into Harry's. They all turn when the door opened and a very tired Lily looked blearily around the room in confusion. Then she recognised Harry.

"Daddy!" she cried out before trying to escape her captors grip. "Let me go!"

"Let her go," Harry repeated, not tearing his eyes away from his daughter.

"Give me the USB," Mace said. Harry didn't really feel he had a choice and threw the stick to Mace who nodded at the man holding Lily. Before Harry could even blink Lily had run towards him and he held her close.

"Hi sweetheart," he said stroking her hair. "God I missed you," he said, kissing her hair. "Listen, Dimitri is going to take you outside so you can see your mum."

"No!" Lily said. "I'm not going with anyone else!"

"Lily, I promise your mum is right outside," Harry said quickly, knowing time was limited. How long before they found the file was fake he didn't know. Lily shook her head passionately. He hated himself for doing it, but he handed Lily over to Dimitri and she screamed because this was someone she didn't know.

"Just take her to Ruth," Harry said over her tears. Dimitri didn't look like he had any idea what to do with a crying toddler, but he did what he was told and quickly left the house. Mace was too involved with unlocking the memory stick to stop them and Harry felt like he could breathe a sigh of relief.

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><p>"Let me go!" Lily shouted at Dimitri as the cold night air hit her when they left trough the front door. "I want to go home! I want my mummy and daddy! Let me go you bad, bad man!"<p>

"You're a little firecracker aren't you?" Dimitri said as he heard the car door opening, knowing it would be Ruth. "Stop shouting and you'll see your mum over there," he said pointing. Lily glared at him for a moment before turning around.

"Mummy!" Ruth was crouched down on the ground, her arms wide as Lily ran towards her. Ruth held the little girl so tight as if she was never going to let go and kissed her hair.

"Oh, thank you God," she whispered, keeping Lily close as the three of them got into the car.

"Mummy, you're hurting me," Lily said quietly. Ruth loosened her grip and stared at her daughters face.

"Are you okay?" Lily nodded, and then shivered. Ruth took her coat off quickly and wrapped Lily up in it. She was laying on the back seat of the car and her eyes were heavy. "Go to sleep," Ruth said, wiping her own tears away. "Go to sleep and we'll be home before you know it."

"Okay," Lily said. "Don't leave me alone again."

"I won't," Ruth said, feeling her heart break. She stroked Lily's hair until her breathing evened out and she had slipped into a deep sleep. Ruth turned to Dimitri who was watching from the front seat. "Thank you," she said sincerely.

"It was Harry," Dimitri said.

"Where is he?" Ruth asked.

"I don't know," he replied. "Somewhere in that house but he's taking longer than I thought. I'm worried something might have gone wrong."

"I don't care," Ruth said. But she knew that was a lie.

"Ruth, you might be angry, mad and upset with him, but you do care about him. Its written all over your face." Ruth didn't bother replying because it was true. She gripped Lily's hand tightly before looking at the front door of the house, wondering what was going on behind those walls.


	19. Chapter 19

**Thanks for all the enthusiastic reviews to the last instalment. Hope I don't let anyone down here..**

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><p>"This is ridiculous," Ruth said quietly so as not to disturb Lily. "Its been too long. Dimitri you have to go back in there."<p>

"No I can't," he said instantly. "Harry told me to stay with the two of you, whatever happens."

"I'm not completely incapable," Ruth said indignantly.

"We all know that," Dimitri said, catching her eye in the mirror. "But I think you don't know how much he values your life and Lily's above his own. He'd rather die than let anything happen to either of you."

"He doesn't know what's good for him," Ruth said under her breath. "At least call Ros and find out what's going on."

"I don't think we'll need to," Dimitri said as two special forces vans arrived.

"What if they kill him?" Ruth said, trying to keep her voice low for Lily's sake. Dimitri didn't have an answer for her.

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><p>As soon as a screaming Lily had vanished from the house, Harry focused on the situation at hand. His daughter was safe, and he could focus on that later. "Are you finished torturing me by kidnapping my family or can we go?" Harry said making Mace look up from his laptop.<p>

"Just one question before you do," he said. "Why don't my encryption codes work to unlock this memory stick?"

Shit. "Are you inputting them correctly?"

"Don't insult my intelligence," Mace said, standing up as the two guards trained their guns on both Lucas and Harry. "You thought you'd get away with this?" Before Harry even saw it coming he felt a blinding pain in his jaw as Mace had just punched him. By the time Harry brought himself to focus, he saw that Lucas was holding a gun directly to Mace's chest. Mace who didn't look the least bit concerned that a gun was pointing at him, knowing that the other two would shoot Harry the second their leader was hurt. Harry actually felt a gun digging into his back as the thought occurred to him.

"Would you really have hurt Lily?" Harry said, wanting to kill some time while he thought about how to get out of this. "I seem to remember you have four daughters yourself." Mace started glaring at Harry but couldn't close the gap because of Lucas's gun directed at his chest. "Your eldest is a journalist if I remember rightly. It wouldn't do if something… untoward happened to her would it?"

"Are you threatening my family?" Mace said with a growl.

"I wonder where I got that idea from," Harry said sarcastically. "At least your daughter is grown up and able to take care of herself. Lily's three."

"Don't you ever come near my family," Mace said, his eyes burning with fury. He seemed to have forgotten he was after the correct USB in the fear of Harry hurting his family. A threat which of course he'd never follow through with but Mace didn't know that.

"How the hell do you think I feel?" Harry said. "You beat my baby-sitter to a pulp, took my daughter from her bed while she was sleeping in the middle of the night, to try and manipulate me. And you're the one saying that I shouldn't threaten your family? That's a bit rich."

Mace didn't say anything but breathed heavily. "Where's the file Harry?"

"Its pointless," Harry said. "You must know by now that you'll never get your hands on it."

"Then I'll kill you."

"And have a dead body on your hands with no chance of getting what you want. What then?" Harry said. "You've lost your main bargaining chip. I care more about Lily than I do myself. So if you want to shoot me, go ahead. But it will get you nothing."

For the first time, Mace looked worried. Harry felt the gun slacken against his back and wondered if he could breathe yet. Everyone turned as there was a loud bang on the door as if it was trying to be knocked down. Then everything happened very quickly. Gunshots were sprayed everywhere and Harry ducked to the floor, but he knew he hadn't been quick enough. A blinding pain went through him and he clutched his hand to his neck as the blood poured from the bullet wound that had just missed the main artery.

"Shit," he cursed, already finding breathing painful. Lucas was leaning over him, seeing the damage and sighed.

"Will you stop looking at me and get an ambulance," Harry said quickly. It jarred Lucas out of is stupor and he did quickly. Harry looked around while keeping pressure on his neck wound and was somewhat satisfied to see Phillip Mace with a hole blown in his head. Although disappointed that he himself didn't get to kill him, he thought that right now he had bigger problems. Such keeping enough blood running through his body so he could manage to get to hospital while still alive.

Maybe he blacked out for a few minutes, but it didn't take long before he was being loaded on a stretcher. Harry felt very faint, and he hoped this wasn't a bad sign.

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><p>"Oh my God," Ruth breathed as she saw the stretcher being carried out of the house. She'd heard the gunshots but prayed Harry would have been okay. Clearly not, as he already had an oxygen mask on.<p>

"Dimitri, can you look after Lily for a minute?"

"Of course," he said.

"If anything happens to her, I'll kill you," Ruth said, and the matter of fact tone she used made it more serious than anything else she could have said. Dimitri nodded and locked the doors the second Ruth closed the car door. She ran to the stretcher being loaded into the ambulance and the wound on his neck became horribly apparent.

"Oh God," she said before she could stop herself.

"Lil?"

"Sleeping in the car," Ruth said quickly. "Harry, you can't die on me you know?"

"I don't plan on it," he said in a ragged whisper.

"I'm still mad at you, and its so hard to be angry with a dead man."

"Oh good," Harry said sarcastically. "And there was me thinking you actually wanted me around."

"Don't die and we'll discuss it later." Harry nodded and then realised that wasn't the smartest thing with the location of his gunshot wound.

"I want you to go home," Harry said. "Let Lily sleep in a proper bed. It'll do no good to have you uncomfortable in a hospital waiting room." Ruth reluctantly agreed and then left the ambulances as the paramedics were eager to be off. Ruth took a deep steadying breath and then returned to the car where Dimitri was still watching Lily as he had promised.

"Can you drive us home?" Ruth thought getting in the driving seat herself wasn't wise when all she could see in her minds eye was blood pouring from Harry's neck.


	20. Chapter 20

That night Ruth got little more than an hours sleep. She kept waking up, worried about both Lily and Harry. She kept checking on Lily, but she was always fine, sleeping like an angel. Ruth called the hospital and found that Jo was out of it, on morphine but should make a full recovery in time, and that Harry was still in surgery. As the receptionist repeatedly informed her with more and more annoyance, he was in no immediate danger, but put very simply, the bullet needed removing. The worry over Harry and her fear of anything happening to Lily gave her a very restless night.

She still wasn't sure about the state of her relationship with Harry anymore, but because of the lateness of the hour, the simplest thing to do had been to sleep in his bed. Which hadn't added to her comfort either. The bed seemed so large without him in it, and his scent was all around her, making her wonder how everything had gone so wrong in less than twenty four hours.

When Lily came around her doorframe at six in the morning, Ruth didn't have the heart to send her back to bed. "Come here," she said with a smile. Lily hopped up on the bed and allowed her mother to hug her tightly for a moment. "Are you okay gorgeous?"

"Yes," she said with a perfect smile. "Where's daddy?"

"He's in hospital," Ruth said. "He got a little hurt when he was trying to get you out of there last night."

"He'll be okay won't he?"

"Yes, of course," Ruth said with confidence, even though she wasn't entirely convinced. "What happened to you last night?" Ruth asked.

"They hurt Jo jo," Lily said in a sad voice.

"Jo's fine," Ruth said.

"She tried to stop them taking me," Lily said.

"Sweetheart, I promise you Jo is fine. She'll be as good as new in a few weeks."

"That's good," Lily said.

"Can you tell me what happened after that?" Ruth said in a calm voice that hid her fear about what they might have done to her daughter.

"Mummy won't be mad?" Lily said with wide eyes.

_Oh God_, Ruth thought to herself. "No, of course I won't be mad," she said stroking her hair.

"Well, after Jo jo fell to the floor they grabbed me and put me in a car," Lily said as her mothers hands reassuringly stroked her hair. "They drove for a while and I was tired. I didn't know where we were. I was carried into a boring bedroom. No pink." Ruth smiled and Lily continued. "I always had a man with me. A guard or something. I don't know. He said he wanted something from my daddy. A lot of stuff I didn't understand."

Lily came to a stop and Ruth looked at her intensely. "You said you wouldn't be mad?"

"No, I won't," Ruth said.

"Well, I told him that I knew a secret. Daddy didn't know I knew it. And I went like this." Lily curled her finger in a "come here" motion and Ruth bent closer in spite of herself. "And then I went to whisper in his ear. And then I screamed as loud as I could." Lily bit her lip as if expecting her mum to start telling her off. Ruth was torn between amusement and horror. They really could have hurt her for acting like that. But then her parents weren't people to back away from a fight either, so she surmised that she shouldn't be surprised.

Lily continued. "He ran away, locked the door and I went to sleep. Then I was seeing daddy again."

"I'm glad you're safe," Ruth said, kissing her hair.

"Can we see daddy and Jo jo today?"

"Yes, I'll see how they're doing, but I'm sure we can visit them in hospital." She kissed Lily's head one more time before going downstairs to make her breakfast.

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><p>Ruth looked through the window on Harry's hospital door and was pleased to see he was awake. She crouched down to Lily and spoke seriously to her. "Daddy might not be feeling well, so do your best to be quiet for him. Okay?" Lily nodded furiously, determined to be a good girl. Ruth opened the door a fraction, grabbing Harry's attention. "Do you feel up to a couple of visitors?" she asked quietly.<p>

"Only if its my favourite people," Harry said in a very weak and hoarse voice that scared Ruth slightly, even though he was smiling.

"Go on Lil," Ruth said, opening the door further and Lily bounded in, a smile on her face as she approached Harry.

"Hey gorgeous," Harry said, ruffling her hair.

"You sound all wrong daddy," she said in an upbeat voice.

"I'll sound better soon," he said with a smile. "I missed you."

"Good," she said with a toothy smile.

"How are you?" Harry asked Ruth.

"Tired," she admitted. "I didn't sleep much."

"I'm sure you didn't," he said. He paused as Lily started chatting to herself, perched on her fathers hospital bed. "Ruth, are you going to forgive me?"

"Can you look after her, I want to check on Jo," Ruth said.

"Ruth?" he said, calling her back. "You didn't answer me."

"I don't know Harry," she said with a sigh. "I really don't know. But if anything happens to her I'll kill you." This was the second time she'd made this threat in two days, and wondered where her sudden streak of violence had come from. She closed the door while hearing Harry talking to Lily and moved up a floor to find Jo. She needed to talk to a friend, and this was the best she could do.

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><p><strong>I promise Ruth will come to her senses soon, with a little help from Jo. In the meantime, thanks for all the reviews so far, and I'd love it if you leave one for this offering too. xxx<strong>


	21. Chapter 21

Ruth quietly went into Jo's hospital room, seeing the blonde's eyes closed. She assumed she was sleeping and didn't want to disturb her, in spite of how much was weighing on her mind.

"I'm so sorry," Jo said.

"Don't be," Ruth said. "You did all you could."

"How is she?"

"Arguing with Harry at the moment," Ruth said. "She's fine. Thank you for trying to keep her safe."

"I failed though," Jo said, shaking her head.

"No, don't move," Ruth said as Jo made to sit up. "I'm grateful that you tried. But I didn't exactly plan for you to end up with broken ribs when Harry asked you to baby sit."

"It wasn't on my list either." Jo smiled.

"I needed to talk to you," Ruth said. "If you're feeling up to it?"

"Anything to distract myself from the large knitting needles spiking into my lungs," Jo said. "Go ahead."

And Ruth explained everything that happened last night when she had been in hospital. How Harry had refused to give up the state secret for their daughter. How she was still angry at him, although the intense fury she had felt last night had burnt out somewhat.

"I love him, I do," Ruth said. "More than what I've ever felt for anyone, but I can't forgive him Jo. And I want to. It just feels like I don't have it in me."

"He did the right thing," Jo said quietly.

"I know," Ruth said. "Logically and rationally I know he did the right thing. But he thought so clearly at the time. He didn't think like a father or a parent, he thought like the head of the section. I don't know… I can't comprehend how he acted so normally."

"Harry never wants to fall apart ever," Jo said. "He can't stand showing weakness, especially in front of you and you know that Ruth." She nodded as Jo continued. "He wants to be strong for you. He might have been holding it together on the surface, but I can bet he was just as worried as you were. Even if he didn't show it."

"I know that," Ruth said. "He made a choice though, to risk Lily's life. How can a father do that? How can the man I love do that?"

"He took a gunshot for that girl, and he would gladly have died for her. Either of you actually." Jo paused as Ruth was absorbing this. "Do you want my honest opinion?"

"Yes," Ruth said fervently.

"You're not angry with him for this," Jo said. "You're angry for what might happen in the future. For the knowledge that this could happen again. That Lily could be taken from you both and you wouldn't get her back. That's what frightens you. And you're directing your anger at him, because he's done something you can realistically place your blame onto."

"God, Jo. What if I lose her?" Ruth said quietly as she realised that Jo was absolutely right. "I couldn't bear it."

"She could be hit by a bus tomorrow," Jo said.

"Thanks a lot," Ruth said.

"My point is, if you worry about everything that **could** happen to her, you'll never breathe again. You can't blame Harry for the dangers she could face. It isn't fair."

"I'm so scared Jo," Ruth said quietly.

"How would you feel if Harry had traded Evergreen for Lily's life? And when, in a month or two it was used in China, Russia or America pick wherever you like. You'd be seeing thousands of dead people on the news while Lily is perfectly safe. How would you feel?"

Ruth considered this possibility for a moment. "Very guilty," she said. "I think I'd probably be blaming him for not finding another way," she admitted eventually.

"Exactly," Jo said.

"I've been on the run with Lily for so long," Ruth said shaking her head. "I thought Britain would be safer once everything else had been dealt with.

"Since when have you an Harry ever done anything the easy way?" Ruth nodded her head in agreement. It was true after all. "Just tell him you love him and the rest will work itself out."

"Its not that easy," Ruth said.

"But it's a start." Jo closed her eyes and shuffled on the bed, clearly in pain. "Now go away and make up with him while I drift away on my morphine." Ruth smiled and agreed that she would before Jo's breathing settled into the regular beats of sleep. She left her friend and quickly went back to Harry's room, pausing before she opened the door, trying to get her twisted thoughts into some kind of order. She opened the door with half a smile, seeing Lily sitting on Harry's bed, talking a mile a minute. A story Ruth couldn't really follow, but she pulled up a chair anyway.

"I'm sorry," Ruth said quietly when Lily's monologue came to an end. "I shouldn't have…"

"Don't," Harry said. "You've no reason to apologise, so just don't." Ruth nodded and grasped his hand lightly.

"Look mummy! Daddy plaited my hair!" Lily said as the silence spread out. Lily turned so Ruth could see the very neat braid.

"You have hidden talents I see," Ruth said to him.

"Catherine," he explained. "Are you okay?"

"Yes," Ruth said. And it was almost true. But she felt very soft towards him now. Her anger was burning out. She squeezed his hand and smiled.


	22. Chapter 22

**Thanks for all the great reviews so far, they really mean a lot to me. I can see how I'm going to finish this now, so only two or three chapters to go after this one.**

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><p>Two days later Ruth was helping Harry into the house, who was getting frustrated by all attempts to help him. He didn't like being helpless. Lily was settled watching her favourite cartoon while Ruth helped Harry up to bed. It was only five in the afternoon, but he was on a lot of painkillers and had been sleeping a lot lately, to overcome his injury.<p>

"Stop being stubborn," Ruth said as Harry half sat, half collapsed on the bed.

"I don't like being like this," he said with a sigh.

"Can I see?" Ruth said, indicating the dressing on his neck which was halfway to falling off anyway. Harry nodded once and she very gently removed it, to reveal the puckered and scarred skin beneath. She brushed her fingertips over the injury as soft as a whisper. "Half an inch to the left and you would have been dead before the ambulance got to you," she said quietly.

"I know," he said quietly. He caught her hand as it fell from his neck and looked into her eyes. "Am I forgiven?"

"Yes," she said. "I'm not going to lie, it was one of the scariest hours of my life. I just wanted to blame someone. And you were the one telling me that I couldn't go straight there and get her back. I wanted to hurt you."

"I know. You're eyes were telling me so, until I left you in the car."

"How could you have reacted so calmly?" Ruth asked. Something that had been bothering her. "It didn't seem to affect you when our daughter had been snatched."

"Of course it did," Harry said. "But you were falling apart, and in order to get her back, one of us had to be thinking clearly. Rationally. I was terrified, but I had to block that out to try and get her safe. That's all Ruth. I care just as much as you do. I love her just as much too."

The emotion over their daughter, seeing that Harry had literally been an inch from death… it was too much for her and the tears started falling. Harry hadn't expected this and didn't know if his comfort would be welcome or not. He tentatively put an arm around her and she collapsed into his chest, her restraint seemingly vanished. He ran his hand up and down her back soothingly as she calmed herself down. When the tears eventually gave way, she lifted her head and lightly kissed him. It was so quick and so soft, that he wasn't entirely sure it had happened. But the look in her eyes told him that it had.

"You rest," she said softly. "I'm going to make Lily's dinner, put her to bed and then come and join you okay?" Harry nodded and watched as Ruth left the room. He put his fingers to his lips remembering her touch. He slept with a smile on his face.

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><p><em>"How did you know where to find me?" Ruth said, the cold wind biting into her face.<em>

_"Adam."_

_"Of course," she said rolling her eyes._

_"No matter what I say, you're going to leave aren't you?" Harry said approaching her, his brown eyes boring into her blue ones._

_"I don't have a choice. I'd rather run and be free than end up in prison." She ran a hand down his arm and grasped his hand tightly. "You know I have to leave."_

_"It shouldn't happen this way," he said shaking his head against the freezing air. "Not for us."_

_"I know," she replied with a smile that belied her aching heart. "Look after yourself Harry. I'd hate to think that I'm keeping us both out of prison only for you to end up shot."_

_"I won't," he said. "I want to tell you something before you leave."_

_"Don't," she said firmly. "Please. Don't."_

_"I'll never see you again," he said, keeping her fingers in his grip. "Its my last chance."_

_"Don't," she repeated. "It's the last thing I'll ever ask from you Harry."_

_"Why?"_

_"I already know what you're trying to tell me," she said with a smile. "I don't regret anything that happened between us Harry. I honestly don't."_

_"Good," he said with a smile from the heart. "Because I don't either. I couldn't." _

_She smiled and then turned to the boat that was going to take her away from London. Away from him._

_"I have to go."_

_"I know. Just wait a second." Harry put a hand on the small of her back and pulled her body close against his. Even with the many layers of fabric between them she still felt warm and wonderful. He kissed her without preamble and felt her body react to his. He knew how soft and desirable her body was beneath her clothes. He knew her reactions to him now, and he never wanted the kiss to stop._

_"You're going to have to let me go," she said, somehow still smiling when they broke apart. He reluctantly let his grip on her loosen until his hands were at his sides and she was a step or two away, heading in the direction of the waiting boat._

_And then it changed. They both turned to follow the noise and Harry felt his heart drop. On the deck were both Phillip and Oliver Mace, and they had a gun each, both trained on Ruth. Before she could so much as back away a step, they both pulled the trigger and she crumpled to the ground. The second Harry looked for the Mace brothers and they'd vanished. He ran to Ruth who was lying in a rapidly expanding pool of her own crimson blood._

_"No," he whispered, crouching over her as her eyes fluttered open._

_"Ouch," she said in a broken voice. Harry looked at her wounds and knew it was too serious for her to live. "How bad?" she asked quietly. The truth was in his eyes. "Oh God."_

_"You'll be alright," he whispered, one hand holding her face, the other pressing on the wound to her stomach._

_"Don't lie."_

_"Okay, I won't lie," he said cradling her face, even as he felt the tears burning. "I'm sorry."_

_"Its okay," she said quietly. A voice that was fading rapidly. "Kiss me." He smiled in reassurance and then did, putting all the love he could into that embrace. He drew away when he felt her face suddenly relax._

_"Ruth?" He moved and put his hand to her pulse. "Oh God," he whispered, and the tears overflowed. He buried his face in her hair, unable to let her go._

"Harry, wake up," Ruth said firmly.

"No, no, no," he cried out in his sleep. "Come back to me. Please."

Ruth reached across him and slapped his face. It was enough to bring him back to reality. His breathing was heavy and he felt lost in terror. "Its okay," she said quietly.

"Tell me you're alright," he said breathing heavily.

"I'm okay," she said. "I'm fine." He looked at her, his eyes running all over her as if to reassure himself of those words. "What happened?" she asked when he started staring at the ceiling.

"Bad dream."

"I guessed that," she said, her hand drifting over his arm, trying to reassure him.

"We were saying goodbye at the dock. Like we did years ago," Harry said in a very quiet and hushed voice. "Then Mace shot you. You were… dying in my arms and there was nothing I could do." Silent tears were falling down his cheeks and she lay on top of him, her head on his chest as his arms tightened around her, almost to the point of pain.

"I'm not going anywhere," she said.

"Promise me," he said as she lifted her head to look at him. "I can't lose you again."

"I promise, I'm not leaving. You won't lose me." She was talking about more than a nightmare and they both knew it.

"Come here," he whispered. She did and he kissed her passionately, hands in her hair. Their tongues were tangling together as they tasted each other. The reality of her sweetness was exactly what he needed to remove the fear of her death. He never wanted to part from her but eventually the need for oxygen overcame them, and they parted.

"I love you," he whispered.

"I know," she said, her hand resting over his heart. "I love you too."


	23. Chapter 23

**Wow, only two reviews for the last chapter! I guess it wasn't very popular. Thanks to pook and threesummerdays for reviewing anyway. Here's the almost final part,**

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><p>They both woke in the middle of the night for no reason at all. Harry turned to her and kissed her insistently. She let out a tiny little moan he'd heard before, and he knew what that meant. "You're beau…"<p>

"Ssh," she said, putting a finger to his lips. She smiled and kissed him again. Without any words at all, they made love quietly in the middle of the night. Very quickly she drifted off into sleep and he knew he'd been forgiven. Sex was not something Ruth ever took lightly, so he knew she was no longer angry with him. He kissed her hair and then settled down next to her, this time into a very restful sleep.

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><p>"You are not serious," Ruth said as she got dressed.<p>

"There's nothing wrong with me," Harry said as he picked up her favourite tie of his.

"You were shot a few days ago," Ruth said. "Forgive me if I think going back to work too soon is idiotic."

"I'll be behind a desk, I'll be fine."

"I've heard that before," Ruth said. "I worry."

"Don't," he said. "I'll be home before you know it." Before Ruth could argue further he'd left the bedroom and was heading downstairs. Ruth heard Lily following her father, clearly hungry for breakfast. Ruth tied her hair up before going into the kitchen where Lily was happily munching on her toast. "Don't look at me like that," Harry said.

"You didn't even turn around," Ruth said, trying to stop the smile from forming on her face.

"I didn't have to," Harry said, finally facing her. His eyes ran over her intently and Ruth felt her face burn with the look of passion in his eyes. Not exactly appropriate in front of their daughter but Lily was too busy concentrating on her toast to notice.

"Mummy, can we go swimming today?" Lily asked.

"Yes of course," Ruth said. Lily hadn't been swimming since she'd been in France which was an eternity to a three year old after all. "You'd like that wouldn't you?"

"Yes!" she said with a wide smile.

"Typical," Harry said. "I'm going back to the grid and you'll be in a bikini."

"I haven't worn a bikini since I was sixteen, so don't get your hopes up," Ruth said with a smile. "Come home safely, please." Her worry was clear, even underneath the teasing.

"I will," he said. He kissed her briefly before leaving the house.

"When can we go?" Lily asked. Ruth smiled and ruffled her hair happily.

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><p>"I wasn't expecting you back at work so soon," Nicholas Blake said as Harry sat opposite him.<p>

"I had something to do," Harry said. He found in his inside jacket pocket an envelope and handed it to Blake. "Its my resignation."

"You've had a very emotional week," Blake said. "Are you sure you don't want to give this some thought?"

"I am absolutely sure," Harry said sincerely. "They kidnapped my daughter to try and get to me. I will not risk her again. And I don't want anything happening to Ruth either because of her relationship with myself. I'd never get over it if anything happened to either of them."

"This is not why I agreed to give her her freedom," Blake said.

"I don't care," Harry countered. "I can't have either of them in danger. I'll work out my notice and train my replacement. I've been having a look at possible recruitments. Miss Watts in section A looks more than capable from all reports."

"She also has a daughter I understand," Blake said.

"I raised my children once while doing this job. They both grew up safely. If I do it again, I rather feel like I'm pushing my luck."

"I understand," Blake said. "I want you to think about it seriously."

"Is this so everyone gets me to die in the service as opposed to the rather nice pension awaiting me if I happen to survive?"

"Harry…"

"Sorry," he said with half a smile. "Couldn't resist. Anyway, you're not the only person getting a copy of that letter. The DG is getting one too. I'm serious."

"Okay," Blake replied. "I'll push it through."

"Thank you." Harry got up to leave and felt as though a massive weight had been lifted from his shoulders. He hadn't confided in Ruth, but he hoped she'd be happy. Whatever she thought though, there was no way he was going back to be the head of counter terrorism. The price was too high, and in the end, it just wasn't worth it.

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><p>Ruth got out of the car with a very damp and very happy Lily jabbering away to herself. She smiled and went to the front door when she stopped. It was unlocked. Looking at her watch she knew that no one should be home yet and was starting to panic. She carefully opened the door, keeping Lily's hand tight in hers. She saw Harry's coat hanging by the door but the thought didn't immediately relax her.<p>

"Its okay," came his voice from the kitchen. "Stop worrying." She breathed a sigh of relief and let Lily go who leaped into the kitchen happily.

"Daddy!"

"Oof, you're getting heavy," Harry said as he picked her up in his arms. He flinched away as the water droplets from her hair splashed his face. "You had fun did you?"

"Yes!"

"What are you doing home at this time?" Ruth asked.

"I quit."

"You what! !" Lily looked around at Ruth in alarm.

"Mummy?"

"I'm sorry sweetheart. I mean, you did what?" she said in a normal tone.

"I quit. I never want to put either of you in danger, so I took away the opportunity."

"I wasn't asking for that," Ruth said as Harry put their daughter back on solid ground as she promptly ran off again.

"I know," he said. "Its about time though. I feel like if I'm in this job any longer, I'll end up dead, or worse."

"I'm not going to argue with you," she said. "But are you sure about this?"

"Do you have any idea how I'd manage to live with myself if something happened to either of you? And then to know it was my fault on top of that. I can't do it Ruth."

"But… how are we going to live?" Ruth asked. Harry loved her for saying "we" in that sentence.

"I've got quite a bit put by," he said. "We'll be okay. Plus when you had to leave, I sold your house for you. I put the money in an account which you can use for Lily's university. Whatever you want."

"You did that for me?" she asked with a slightly awed look in her eyes.

"Of course I did. I hadn't planned on Lily at the time, but it seems like… a good use for the money."

"Harry?"

"What?" he asked concerned by the look of worry on her face.

"I love you." He pulled her close with a smile and simply held her. He burried his face in her neck and breathed in. Her usual scent had vanished, replaced by the chlorine of the swimming pool. But she was here, in his arms and safe. After all, that was the most important thing.

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><p><strong>Just the Epilogue to go now :-)<strong>


	24. Epilogue

**Thanks everyone for the reviews and here's the epilogue. Also thanks go to 4ruth who gave me Ruth's job idea in this part.**

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><p>"Hello?" Malcolm poked his head around the front door which had been left unlocked. His spook instincts were on alert, but he wasn't too worried. He'd been in the job for too long, that was all.<p>

"We're through here," Harry called. Malcolm carefully shut the door and went through to the kitchen. Harry was sitting at the table flicking through the days paper while keeping an eye in the back garden where his children were playing in the bright June sunshine.

"How are you?" Malcolm said as he sat down opposite him and Harry put the paper down.

"Good," Harry replied. "Still enjoying retirement. I should have done it years before I actually did."

"Mm," Malcolm agreed with a smile. "How's Ruth?"

"Fine," Harry replied. "Better than fine actually. Very happy. It took way too long but we got here eventually."

"Where is she?"

"Still at work," Harry replied. "She had a late lecture today."

"Greek classicists?"

"Of course," Harry said with pleasure in his wife's intellect. "I thought it meant I'd be spared the stuff, but whenever she's get home she's always so excited I get the extra hour that she couldn't fit into class."

"I can imagine," Malcolm said with a smile. "I see your girls are happy."

"Mm," Harry said. "Julia is just like how Lily was at that age. I wondered sometimes if the age gap would matter between them, but it really doesn't."

"Just wait until you have two teenage girls on your hands," Malcolm said with raised eyebrows.

"Thanks for that," Harry said. They both turned as the front door opened and Ruth came in. She kissed her husband on the cheek before turning to their friend.

"Hi Malcolm," she said sitting down between them, looking at her daughters for a long moment.

"You said you'd call Catherine today?" Ruth asked.

"Yes, she's flying in next Friday. With her husband."

"You promised you'd be nice," Ruth reminded him.

"She eloped without even telling either of her parents," Harry said. "What am I supposed to think?"

"Maybe that you're not the most forgiving of men," Ruth said, her lip twitching. "Maybe that she doesn't want you to be disappointed in her. She had been with Steven for six years, it couldn't have been that much of a shock Harry." His only response was to breathe heavily. He thought that arguing with her wouldn't make him win the fight anyway.

"How are the ancient Greeks?" Malcolm asked.

"She doesn't need your encouragement," Harry said under his breath as Ruth started talking about Aristotle and Harry stopped paying attention, looking at his girls instead. Julia had long blonde hair which she refused to let anyone cut, matching her sisters dark locks. Despite the five year age gap between them they got on really well, and Julia followed Lily everywhere. It was particularly difficult when Lily went to school, because Julia sometimes felt abandoned. But there was less than a few months before Julia started school herself, at least part time. Then he'd have the house to himself, and he didn't know what he'd do with the silence. It seemed odd to him that he'd managed to live alone for nearly a decade, now he was always waiting for his family to come home. It was an eminently preferable circumstance.

"Harry?" Ruth said quietly.

"Sorry what did you say?" he said turning back to her.

"In all seriousness you are going to be nice to Steven aren't you?" Ruth said, well aware that their daughters were his distraction.

"Of course I am," he said. "She'll never come back to the UK if I'm not."

"Glad you see that," Ruth said. "Do you want a drink Malcolm?"

"No, I was only dropping in for a moment. To see how you are." He paused before adding the next part of what he'd wanted to tell them. "I'm going back to the south of France."

"Good," Ruth said with a smile. "Bet its hot out there right now."

"Do you miss it?" Malcolm asked. Harry turned and watched her, very intrigued over the answer.

"I miss bits of it," she admitted. "I miss the little French market I used to go to every Saturday. I liked that you could hear the ocean from my house. But mostly, no I don't."

"We could have bought a house nearer the ocean," Harry reminded her.

"I like this house," she said glaring at him firmly. "I told you that before we bought it. We've had this argument."

"What are you fighting about?" Lily said as she came into the kitchen, Julia on her heels.

"Our house," Ruth said bluntly. "No, only one before dinner Lil," she said as her daughter had been reaching for the biscuits. Lily gave the second one to her sister and they returned outside, enjoying the sunshine while they had it. Ruth was watching the girls and Harry was watching her. Malcolm sensed it was time to leave and he said his goodbyes quickly. Harry watched him go and then wrapped his arms around Ruth's waist.

"Thank you," he whispered into her ear.

"For what?"

"For our family." She smiled and kissed him briefly, his hands wandering under the fabric of her blouse.

"Later," she said with a smile.

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><p><strong>The End.<strong>

**I am now completely out of ideas, so will be taking a short HR break!**


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